She ate daisies...

2003-10-01T17:00:00.000-04:00

Well, well, well... here I am again. As I sit here at the public library pondering life and free exchange of knowledge I am surprised by how many truly stange people frequent the public library (myself not included of course). As you all know I have some strange force that surrounds me and attracts strange men to do stupid things. In keeping with this tradition last summer I had come to the library to check out a book and had a man actually lie down on the floor and try to look up my skirt. When I kicked him in the stomach he sheepishly tried to pretend that he had dropped something on the floor and was trying to retrive it. I didn't buy it, especially since I am quite sure what ever he dropped did not end up under my skirt. PERVERT!

Anyway, you all must be wondering what I've been up to lately while obviously have not been blogging from public library...

I did attend the Dave Matthews Band concert in Central Park and will now grace you with the amazing set list:
Wednesday Sep 24 2003
Central Park

Don’t Drink the Water
So Much To Say
Too Much
Granny
Crush
When The World Ends
Dancing Nancies
Warehouse
Ants Marching
Rhyme & Reason
Two Step
Help Myself
Cortez The Killer *
Jimi Thing *
What Would You Say
Where Are You Going
Watchtower
__________________

Grey Street
What You Are
Stay

Special Guests:
* Warren Haynes

The entire show was amazing and for those of you who missed it, you can view it shortly as Dave will be releasing it as a cd and dvd in the near future. And in watching the DVD you will avoid having to stand in line for over 3 hours trying to enter the park from 2 entrances along with 100,000 other Dave Matthews fans and only about 6 ticket takers. Great planning guys. No really, just super.

Thursday night I was honored to be invited to Joe's Pub to see Raul Midon perform. I had never heard of this guy before Thursday night and I must say he blew me away. Absolutely Incredible! This guy could play the guitar like nobody's business!!! We left Joe's pub and headed to a night spot for drinks and dinner where I ran into none other than Bjork and her cute little dog.

Friday night I decided to go back to Joe's Pub to see my favorite eastmountainsouth I ordered one drink and kicked back and enjoyed the show. The show was amazing, everything I imagined it would be and then the check came... you see, since I had been invited out on Thursday night I didn't pay - but how expensive could one drink be anyway??? $18??? You must be kidding, you say. No. One drink and it cost me $18 f*%king dollars. Incredible. Only in New York f$%king City... now I feel really bad about Thursday night cause I had a few of those suckers. Ooops. Oh well.

Let's see... this weekend was great! My UT Vols beat South Carolina in overtime to make us 4-0 for the season and my wonderful, amazing, hunky, fantasy Tennessee Titans boyfriend, Drew Bennett, scored a touchdown to beat the Steelers on Sunday!

Everything was going so nicely until I was informed last night that a state inspector had been by our apartment yesterday with the landlord and deemed the two attic bedrooms of our apartment illegal. Yes, you heard me. Illegal. So what does this mean? This means that Daisy will soon be living in the den. Wonderful. Hopefully it won't be so bad... the den is about twice the size of my current bedroom anyway.

So that's what's been going on here... I am heading up to the Green Mountain this weekend. The folks will be in Burlington for a few days so I'm going to say hello and look at the pretty leaves... can hardly believe it's October already!

2003-09-24T14:40:00.000-04:00

So I took a little trip down to Nashville, TN this past weekend. I had an action packed weekend of Law School Tours, Concerts, Football, Family, and Fun!

Friday morning I visited a Law School that I will be applying to this fall and sat in on a class. The class (Legal Processes) was quite interesting – content of the class eclipsed only by the very HOTT boy who saved me a seat next to him and gave me background on the class with the cutest little southern drawl. Yes, Distractions-R-Us. They would do well to put his beautiful face on the cover of the prospectus - they would get a helluva lot more applications for admission! Like UVA for example - Dave Matthews is pictured on page 6 of their prospectus. Will I be applying to UVA you ask? What do you think???

Then Friday night "TomboBacos who likes guacamole on tacos" got me tickets to see an even HOTTER boy:

Dave Matthews Band
Friday, September 19, 2003
Nashville, Tennessee

#41
Everyday
Granny
Crash
Stay
Dancing Nancies
Warehouse
Bartender
What Would You Say
When The World Ends
Grey Street
Jimi Thing *
Rhyme & Reason
Help Myself
Two Step +~
__________________
Where Are You Going
What You Are

Special Guests:
* Mike Durham
+ Jeff Coffin
~ Futureman

Jeff Coffin and Futureman ROCKED the house!

Saturday saw the Tennessee Vols stomp the Florida Gators in the SWAMP! GO VOLS! A Hail-Mary just before halftime put us up by 4 and the second half was all Vols! I got to watch this one on mom’s new BATV… for those of you not up on your redneck lingo that stands for “Big Ass TV.” Now mom, you just need to get a BAC (Big-Ass Couch) to go with your BATV!

Then Sunday my boy DREW BENNETT finally got the respect he deserves as the “Player of the Game” in the Titans vs. the Saints match up – where the Titans stomped the Saints!!!! What’s that??? TOUCHDOWN DREW BENNETT!!! Uh huh. That’ll teach me to bench him on my Fantasy Team. Yes, the Drew Bennett Fantasy continues… I had great tickets to the game thanks to the Wood and Tiensey and her Boy. We drank lots of very expensive margaritas at the game, so expensive they gave you a little bottle of vaseline with each drink.

I had a wonderful trip in all… I got to see my very pregnant sister and pat her belly for a while. I spent time with my mom doing what southerners know best, eating! I bonded with my little brother over some Dave Matthews Band. I had a date with the Nashville boy and watched a lot of football with the girls and the Wood. Both my flights were delayed so I spent way too much time just sitting around the airport watching it rain and got in to NY really late Sunday night, which makes work on Monday morning not a whole lot of fun.

Alpha the Great and I spent Monday evening together working on our new wish, eating junk food, and watching "The Devil's Playground." Now I would like to discuss this for just a moment. First, just let me reiterate that yes - I already realize that I am a big dork so it is therefore ok to admit that I spent Monday evening watching a documentary about Amish youth and yes - I enjoyed it. Now that I've gotten that out of the way -I just want to say, "What the f*%K?" This documentary explored the Amish tradition of Rumspringa - that is, when Amish youth turn 16 years old they are thrown into the real world to experience all of life's forbidden fruits (tv, video games, driving cars, smoking, alcohol, drugs, sex, etc.). After a period ranging anywhere from a few months to a few years, these kids finally decide whether they want to give up all of these things and join the Amish church or keep them and live in the "English" world. Oh, and by the way, if they choose not to join the Amish church then they are shunned by their friends and family and are not allowed any contact with them. How about that for some family values??? This seems absolutely ridiculous to me!!! If you were a parent would you keep your children away from water their whole lives and never teach them to swim then as soon as they turned 16 just throw them off a boat into the middle of the ocean to see if they can swim???? Incredible! To make things even worse these kids are not educated past the 8th grade so they couldn't get a good job or go to college even if they wanted to. Of course their life is going to be hard, they haven't been prepared to succeed in the real world! They're not being given a REAL choice as to whether or not to join the Amish church, their parents are taking an opportunity to be self-righteous and say I told you so when their kids inevitably come back home. These kids are being set up for failure! The entire documentary focuses on the drugs and sex and alcohol aspect of rumspringa - the material world. But if these people really want to give their children a choice they should give them an education. Give them some books about other religions and make them informed human beings... then ask them whether or not they want to join the Amish church. I was absolutely enthralled/appalled by this film and would love the opportunity to speak to someone who knows more about this subject than I do. My brain just can't comprehend why anyone would think that this was in any form or fashion a good way to raise a child.

Now that I have that off my chest... I am going to see Dave Matthews again tonight! Woo-hoo! I got 2 tix to see the Central park concert tonight! Alpha and I will be heading that way in a few short moments!!! I am sure that there will be a million people there... details to come...

2003-09-16T18:00:00.000-04:00

I feel like such a dork... my laptop blew up last night so this leaves me blogging from the public library. No seriously Daisy, get a life. I know!

I was in an interesting mood last night when I got off from work so I picked up a bottle of Bailey's on my way home to cheer me up. My roomie and I sat and had a very nice looong conversation. I always feel better after talking with her, even if we're just sitting around bullshitting. It could be that she's a cool chick and knows how to put me in a good mood, or it could be the fact that we always seem to finish the bottle... hmmm.

Am working on the PC problem... hope to be up and running again soon!

2003-09-11T08:42:00.000-04:00

A Tribute - Sept. 11, 2001

When Pericles wrote the following tribute it was meant for the children, mothers, brothers, friends, and families of Athens, Greece who had all lost loved ones during the Peloponnesian War. These men died defending a city that, to them, was the embodiment of true Democracy. These men believed democracy so noble an ideal as to lay their lives upon its altar to see that others might continue to enjoy her freedoms. Amazing how fitting this tribute should seem even today to those who feel the same love and pride for America and for New York City. Where Pericles says "I have sung the praises of our city," he very well could have been saying, "I have sung the praises of our country." As Athens was a testament to Democracy, so is the United States; and as her soldiers were a testament to strength and bravery so are the hundreds of policemen, firemen, rescue workers, and American soldiers who have died since September 11th, 2001 fighting to preserve all that America stands for... freedom and justice for all.

"This, then, is the kind of city for which these men, who could not bear the thought of losing her, nobly fought and nobly died. It is only natural that every one of us who survive them should be willing to undergo hardships in her service. And it was for this reason that I have spoken at such length about our city, because I wanted to make it clear that for us there is more at stake than there is for others who lack our advantage; also I wanted my words of praise for the dead to be set in the bright light of evidence. And now the most important of these words has been spoken. I have sung the praises of our city; but it was the courage and gallantry of these men, and of people like them, which made her splendid. Nor would you find it true in the case of many of the Greeks, as it is true of them, that no words can do more than justice to their deeds."
~Pericles' Funeral Oration

2003-09-09T12:26:00.000-04:00

Speaking of living in a fantasy world...

AlphaTheGreat: um, good morning sunshine
AlphaTheGreat: it is going to be nice this weekend.
AlphaTheGreat: I want to go away. Far, far away - to a land unbeknownst
AlphaTheGreat: I want to Tango on the surface of Mars.
Daisy: just the two of us?
AlphaTheGreat: yes, let's re-kindle that old flame.
Daisy: yeah! Where do you want to go?
AlphaTheGreat: Mars! I thought I was being quite clear.
Daisy: I was thinking more along the lines of New Paltz…
AlphaTheGreat: reading your blog now…
AlphaTheGreat: um, STALKER. i am scared.
AlphaTheGreat: this whole pre-occupation you have with Drew and Dave... hm.
Daisy: OBSESSION!
Daisy: this weekend.... hello??? Stay with me now…
Daisy: me and you... rekindling... remember?
AlphaTheGreat: yes, um, we could do a CT thing.
Daisy: NEW PALTZ = camping
AlphaTheGreat: we can go camping in my mom's back yard, shoot the BB Gun, go 4-wheelin, fishing, swimming, hiking, AND have a shower and bathroom to go to.
Daisy: I am anti bb guns. You might kill me with one - or worse, put my eye out.
AlphaTheGreat: um, only if we are lucky
AlphaTheGreat: mmmmuaaahahahahahaha
Daisy: I don't trust you with any gun… or motorized vehiculars for that matter.
AlphaTheGreat: hm, I don't trust me with a roll of toilet paper, so what’s your point?
Daisy: exactly!
AlphaTheGreat: your lack of trust astounds me
Daisy: it really shouldn't
AlphaTheGreat: have I ever led you astray?
Daisy: have you met yourself lately?
AlphaTheGreat: hm. Point well taken.
Daisy: yes, indeed.
AlphaTheGreat: I know! Let’s go to Great Adventure!!!
Daisy: Funnel Cakes!
AlphaTheGreat: elephant ears!
Daisy: Corn dogs! Puking on roller coasters!
AlphaTheGreat: that's the spirit!
Daisy: I yelled at my roommate in the little fridge room yesterday…
AlphaTheGreat: what is the little fridge room? Is this a secret hiding spot that I am unaware of?
Daisy: it’s the little room in the kitchen where the fridge is.
AlphaTheGreat: most people would call it a kitchen.
Daisy: but it's not the kitchen, it’s next to the kitchen in a little room all its own. And most people would keep their fridge in the kitchen too… Different Strokes Alpha!
AlphaTheGreat: but the "magical" little fridge room…
AlphaTheGreat: um, are you sure you didn't just imagine it there? Secret room, yeah right!
AlphaTheGreat: I bet you think the fridge has a door that opens to a fantasy world too, huh?
AlphaTheGreat: it's ok, Daisy, I know where you are coming from.
AlphaTheGreat: my apt. has a secret "room" as well… it's called the bedroom.
AlphaTheGreat: and it makes ALL fantasies.... ok, stop
Daisy: Drew Bennett 2003 Fantasies?
AlphaTheGreat: hm. who would my fantasy be about?
Daisy: Rock God?
AlphaTheGreat: probably Ed Norton, or Brad Pitt, or
AlphaTheGreat: yes, Rock God.
AlphaTheGreat: or CEO
Daisy: yummy CEO… Daisy = stealing CEO right out from under your nose
AlphaTheGreat: oh, before we go out next week, there are a few rules when meeting CEO, you are not to speak, no white skirt, no talk of law school, no sounding intelligent.
Daisy: no tongue down his throat?
AlphaTheGreat: make sure you are bloated and wear sweat pants and get really drunk and act the fool so he doesn't dig you.
AlphaTheGreat: cause I will CUT YOU
Daisy: even then he couldn't resist my womanly charms…
AlphaTheGreat: CUT YOU
AlphaTheGreat: well, then I will have to continue my relationship with Rock God.
Daisy: For the team Alpha! Anyone but Rock God!!!!
AlphaTheGreat: he loves me ya know. Bought me a ring and everything.
Daisy: *crying hysterically*
AlphaTheGreat: WELL THEN DON’T TOY WITH MY CEO-TOY!
Daisy: ok, ok... hands off...
AlphaTheGreat: agreed?
AlphaTheGreat: Here, you can have Rock God back...
AlphaTheGreat: *insert Alpha passing Rock God here*
Daisy: ok, agreed.
Daisy: …and life as we know it returned to normal.
AlphaTheGreat: POOF!

2003-09-09T08:58:00.000-04:00

"Well, the sun's not so hot in the sky today
and you know I can see summertime slipping on away.
A few more geese are gone, a few more leaves turning red,
but the grass is as soft as a feather in a featherbed.
So I'll be king and you'll be queen, our kingdom's gonna be this little patch of green.
Won't you lie down here right now in this September grass?
Won't you lie down with me now, September grass.

Oh, September grass is the sweetest kind, it goes down easy like apple wine.
Hope you don't mind if I pour you some, made that much sweeter by the winter to come.

Won't you lie down here right now in this September grass?
Won't you lie down with me now, September grass."
-JT

I've noticed a trend on my site tracker that has alerted me to the apparent interest in my "Drew Bennett Fantasy 2003." So I will do what I can to appease my public and hereforth give you... drumroll please...

Drew Bennett Fantasy 2003
I fly home to Nashville in two weeks and am met at the airport by Drew. He has a dozen roses and smothers me with kisses telling me how much he has missed me since I've been gone and how he's nothing without me. We then take his convertible Jag to Starwood to see the DMBand. One of the bouncers recognizes Drew and invites us backstage to meet the band. The second Dave lays eyes on me he falls deeply and madly in love with me and embraces me in his arms and passionately kisses me. (yes, this is turning into the Dave Matthews Fantasy 2003, but it's my fantasy and I can have whoever I want in it so leave me alone!) Drew is visibly shaken at the sight of seeing the love of his life in such a passionate embrace with another man and a fight ensues between Dave and Drew for my affections. They both take off their shirts (à la Brad Pitt and Edward Norton in Fight Club) and put up their dukes. But I realize this is silly and that there is enough Daisy lovin' to go around - and that Dave would probably get his ass whooped by Drew since Dave is a lover and not a fighter. So the boys shook hands and made up and Dave pledged his undying love to me and went onstage to finish his show as Drew and I danced the night away under the stars...

Or the REAL DREW BENNETT FANTASY 2003 would be that Steve-Freaking-McNair would throw the stoopid football to my boy!!! Drew Bennett is your go-to guy! Don't you know this? What are you doing???? Throw Drew the ball for Christ's Sake!!!!

Um, now that I've gotten that off my chest - it's back to your regularly scheduled program...

2003-09-04T20:45:00.000-04:00

Me fall down go boom.

No seriously, ouch. I fell in the rain today and am in serious pain tonight.

*Insert pitiful face here*
(yes, I am looking for sympathy...)

BTW: I didn't get a chance to post about this earlier in the week, but I think the fact that Justin Timberlake and Missy Elliot both won "the golden spatula" at this year's VMA Awards for best music video over Johnny Cash - the Man in Black himself - is an utter travesty. I would have to say that the "Hurt" video is probably the best video - not just of the year - but EVER! I will never watch MTV again... have lost all respect.

2003-09-04T00:03:00.000-04:00

Aaaaggghhh... hate laptop computers and batteries that die. Lost my last post and it's midnight and I'm tired. Argh.

As I was saying, I am lying in my bed (a little tipsy from the bottle of champagne my roommate and I just polished off) watching The Life of David Gale... not paying close enough attention. I'm going to be lost in about 2 seconds...

Anyway, sorry for the lack of posts lately, but work has been hectic. I have a lot of new responsibilities this year and I am not sure if I should be flattered for the vote of confidence or annoyed at my own reliability and capabilities. So this means no more blogging from work and no more 10:00 mornings... 8:00 AM here I come!

hmmm, so here are some questions from Indigo Steve:

1) Which DMB song do you think has the most meaning and why?
I would have to say Cry Freedom. I think at some point in our lives we've all felt trapped or confined by something. This song reminds me how vulnerable we are as human beings and just how unattainable this thing we call freedom really is (freedom from oppressive governments, from our own consciousness)... the one thing we aspire to as human beings, the hardest thing to actually truly posses ... Compassion is the key to any sort of freedom and is the only hope for humanity at all.

2) If I came to New York, where would you take me?
That depends on when you came to NY... if you came in the summer then we would get a bottle of wine and some Chinese take-out and head over to Bryant Park to watch an old Black and White movie on the big screen under the stars and lights of Times Square at the summer film festival. If it were winter then we might get a pitcher of margaritas at Tortilla Flats in the West Village before heading over to Rockefeller Center to spend the entire night talking and singing and dancing under stars and sparkling lights of the Christmas tree while waiting for 7:00 AM and standby tickets to SNL.

3) What has been your favorite age so far?
Definitely 16... all of the freedom and none of the responsibility. I remember when my mom handed me the keys to the car and the first time I took off all on my own... the freedom, the liberation, the wind in my hair. The cd I listened to all that summer was laid by James. Even now when I hear it I get a little flutter in my tummy and a taste of the summer of 1994...

4) Where do you go when you want to be alone?
I like to drive at night. I think the lights and the hum of the road help me to clear my mind and relax. When I close the door I feel like I can close out the whole world. Maybe it has something to do with the freedom of the open the road and the possibilties it affords... I love to go out to the beach too, but seeing as I've always lived landlocked that's not always an option. So for me, I get in my car and I drive - sometimes for hours. Sometimes I laugh. Sometimes I cry. Sometimes I question my own sanity. But it doesn't matter because no one is there to answer to... it's my time alone and I can feel however I want to feel, I can listen to whatever I want to listen to, and I can act as silly as I want to act.

5) Pet Peeves, got any?
Guys who ask too many questions. Hee hee. just kidding! :)

2003-08-28T23:06:00.000-04:00

The Interview - from the Joker:

1. You can go out on a fantasy date with any musician, living or dead, in New York City. Where do you go and what do you do? Be specific.
p.s. bonus points for choosing someone other than dave matthews, but if thats your choice, i understand.
Well, I don't know what those bonus points will earn me in the afterlife, but tonight I'm going to say that you can keep your bonus points and I will keep Dave Matthews. I would take him to the Honeymoon Suite at the Pierre Hotel overlooking Central Park. I would order a bottle of champagne and some strawberries from room service and that's about all the specifics I can give. A lady doesn't kiss and tell!

2. Explain your thoughts on "Its not the destination, its the journey".
For me it's always been about the journey... if you live your life trying to reach some distant destination you'll find it to be a life full of disappointment and unfulfillment. Sometimes we set out on a journey to a certain destination and find ourselves being veered off the path in a different direction. Life is about being flexible and following the journey wherever it takes you. That's where I find excitement in life. And it's along this journey where all of life's opportunities present themselves...

3. If you could be a supernatural creature, (i.e. Elf, Fairy, Vampire, etc.) What would you be and why? What are the pros and cons of your choice?
I would be a sprite... they get to play with Rainbow Brite and the all of the Color Kids! However, they are constantly living in a state of fear that Lurky and Murky will come and take all of the color out of the world.

4. You can re-live one day of your life. You can not change anything about it, but only enjoy it all over again. What day is it and what do you do?
May 27, 1978 - that was the day I was born. I don't really remember it, but I have pictures of me in my parents arms and I would give anything to see that look and my daddy's eyes again and to have him hold me in his arms again. I love to see the way my mom is with other babies because I can imagine how she was with me when I was a baby - how we used to play together and how she used to dream about what I would become and what I would do with my life. I would like to have one day where I could be completely vulnerable again, where I could be free from the pressures and fears of the world, and find safety and comfort in the beating of my mother and father's hearts.

5. You are a Gemini. Do you think you possess any of the qualities that go with your sign, like having twin sides? Or do you think astrology is a bunch of bullshit?
Um, I am a Gemini through and through. It's weird how much my personality fits with everything a Gemini is supposed to be... good and bad. I don't believe in horoscopes and that sort of thing but it is definitely v. eerie how much I conform to Gemini standards... for example: Geminis are described to be flexible, flirty, and intelligent to the extreme. I am all this and more... I am adaptable and versatile, communicative and witty, intellectual and eloquent, youthful and lively, sympathetic, thoughtful, courteous, and kind.

But I also have the twin dual-nature qualities as well... I am very non-commital, have a constant need for change (which makes it hard for me to stay in one place very long), I feel very confined by any sort of routine, and I can be very charming and have learned to use this to my advantage. You think women are complex and hard to figure out? A Gemini woman is impossible!

When it comes to love... "In love they are fickle, not intentionally so but because of the basic inconsistency of their emotional nature, which has an amoral aspect to it. Their is a side to Geminians which can become deeply involved emotionally, and another, hostile to sentimentality, which stands back from a romantic situation, laughing at it and the protagonists in it, including themselves while analyzing it intellectually. Gemini subjects take nothing seriously. So, in love, in spite of their temporary depth of feeling, for the intensity of involvement lasts only while it is new. They like intrigue, the excitement of the chase, but once they have caught the prey, they lose interest and look around for the next creature to pursue. Even at their worst they are never dull - there is usually playfulness below the surface, and they can be brilliant conversationalists - but they can also be quarrelsome."

Yeah, it's all me... it's all there. For better and for worse...

And...If you would like to play along and have me interview you, the following rules apply:
1. If you want to participate, please leave me a comment saying "interview me" (along with your e-mail address, please).
2. I will respond by asking you five questions – each person's will be different.
3. You will update your journal with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this explanation and an offer to interview others in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions.

2003-08-27T11:45:00.000-04:00

Top Ten Signs You're In Love With Democratic Presidential Candidate Howard Dean
courtesy of the CBS Late Night Archive

10. You've actually heard of him.
9. Whenever he discusses plans to revitalize economy, you get goosebumps.
8. Named your cats "Howard," "Dean" and "Six-Term Governor Howard Dean."
7. You'll only watch movies featuring Ron Howard or Harry Dean Stanton.
6. When you hear a report on the radio about a highway accident, you murmur, "Please, god, don't let Howard Dean be involved."
5. Constantly complain rival candidate Dennis Kucinich isn't "Howardly" enough.
4. Changed outfit four times before watching appearance on "Meet the Press."
3. You stand by him despite the fact his infidelities embarrassed you in front of the entire...oh wait, wrong Democrat.
2. When he announced his candidacy, you didn't laugh your ass off.
1. You're actually considering wasting a vote on him.

...or maybe, foolish as I know it sounds to some, you truly believe that it's time for change and you believe in Howard Dean's vision of America... and you stay up until the wee hours of the night campaigning across New York City handing out flyers and buttons and t-shirts when you have to be at work at 8:00 am the next morning... and you get goosebumps when you see the reaction of a crowd of 10,000 Americans (young and old, black and white, white-collar and blue-collar) to the idea that we have the power not only to change the Democratic Party, but we have the power to change America!

"Hope laid upon hope,
That this crowd will not subside..."

2003-08-26T14:18:00.000-04:00

Dave Matthews Band
Monday, August 25, 2003
Continental Airlines Arena - NJ

The Stone
Satellite
What Would You Say
If I Had It All
So Much To Say
Rapunzel
Crash
Rhyme & Reason
Watchtower
Cry Freedom
Jimi Thing (w/Dickie Betts and GS)
Where Are You Going
Warehouse
Digging a Ditch
Tripping Billies
__________________

The Maker
Two Step

Special Guests: Dickie Betts and GS

Unfortunately, Dave Matthews did not turn into a giant 1/2 crab... alas, no crab legs last night. But I did have a yummy 1:30 AM burrito... and it was goooood.

2003-08-25T15:52:00.000-04:00

Miss Communication / Miscommunication
see if you can follow the thought processes... from random to even more random... things go downhill quickly... and this is the world we live in...

AlphaTheGreat: I was just thinking about life
Daisy: I hate you!
AlphaTheGreat: (oh, yeah, I get that alot)
Daisy: muwaaaaa haaaa haaaaaaa
AlphaTheGreat: swear words - what is up with them? why are they so "bad"?
AlphaTheGreat: seriously, who made them bad
Daisy: society! the government! the church!
AlphaTheGreat: and this whole life thing... why are we all so different?
AlphaTheGreat: who's experiment are we?
Daisy: It's a conspiracy! It's all a conspiracy.
AlphaTheGreat: the government, church, and conspiracies are on a much smaller level than I can relate to
AlphaTheGreat: government breeds church breeds conspiracy...
AlphaTheGreat: who is right - who is wrong - why do we care
Daisy: me! i am always right. I'm the only one.
Daisy: we don't care. I don't care... do you?
AlphaTheGreat: no such things as conspiracies, only information.
AlphaTheGreat: yes, everyone please bow down to Queen Daisy
AlphaTheGreat: I care about everything and nothing
Daisy: everyone and no one
Daisy: all things - nothings
AlphaTheGreat: let's make a website where people can complain
AlphaTheGreat: different categories of complaints
AlphaTheGreat: and they can complain about anything
AlphaTheGreat: the world, their bosses, their family... for the whole world to see
Daisy: their crazy bacon frying friends...
Daisy: their crazy kitchen-burning-down friends
AlphaTheGreat: (Alpha = #1 bacon fryer on the east coast)...
Daisy: (Daisy = #1 kitchen burner downer in US)
AlphaTheGreat: seriously, you almost made me homeless...
Daisy: tee hee.
AlphaTheGreat: i dont' feel like working - I got so much crap to do
Daisy: blog!
AlphaTheGreat: yes, I am going to blog about the whole "curse" phenomenon
AlphaTheGreat: what are you going to blog about?
Daisy: about how I didn't get my requisite crab legs this weekend.
AlphaTheGreat: or maybe I will blog about how cool my hair looks today
AlphaTheGreat: I WAS JUST THINKING OF THAT
Daisy: um... photo blog
AlphaTheGreat: I could go for some major crablegs tonight
Daisy: hmmm... crab legs vs. dave matthews
AlphaTheGreat: um, yeah that is a tough one - why not both?
Daisy: dave matthews smothered in butter from which to dip my crab legs... much better.
AlphaTheGreat: hmmm, or even better, Dave Mathews suddenly turns into a 1/2 crab, with huge-ass crab legs for your consumption (POOF)
Daisy: mmmmmmmmmm...
AlphaTheGreat: then after you eat them, he will not be able to escape your clutches
Daisy: and I can have my evil ways with him
Daisy: we're sick. you know that? SICK!
AlphaTheGreat: (yes, we are sick...but that is what makes us so f*ing adorable)
AlphaTheGreat: I stopped at 7-11 and got another burrito
AlphaTheGreat: YUCK - never again
Daisy: but it was soooo good Saturday night
Daisy: Tuesday night = not working late = going to city for Howard Dean
AlphaTheGreat: yeah, I think it is something you have to share with someone, because after a while it starts to taste...
AlphaTheGreat: yes, I will be going to Howard dean
Daisy: like ass?
AlphaTheGreat: I think I am going to take a vacation day on Friday
Daisy: were you drunk?
AlphaTheGreat: um, WHAT? Focus here girlie-girl!
AlphaTheGreat: what the h - e - double hockey sticks are you talking about?
Daisy: were you drunk when you ate the burrito... I think you just have to be drunk
AlphaTheGreat: oh, yes I was still a little tipsy - or a lot tipsy
AlphaTheGreat: um, I think I am in love with ****
Daisy: last night?
AlphaTheGreat: no seriously, I think I am in love with Alpha
Daisy: no seriously, when did you get this burrito?
AlphaTheGreat: no seriously, I just got it 20 minutes ago an devoured it
AlphaTheGreat: cheese all falling out and sh*t
Daisy: ...and you're drunk?
AlphaTheGreat: NO! I am not drunk! Are you? weirdo!
Daisy: NO! Exactly what I'm trying to say!!! You have to be drunk to truly enjoy the burrito.
Daisy: my god that was difficult. why is it that you never understand me?
Daisy: is it me? is it you?
AlphaTheGreat: it's Allah - he is making me not understand you
AlphaTheGreat: Daisy = WEIRD
Daisy: Alpha = no more burritos unless intoxicated
AlphaTheGreat: Alpha = sad face girl who has to work late, and is very tired, and doesn't feel like working at all!
Daisy: quit.
AlphaTheGreat: only if you will take care of me
AlphaTheGreat: financially
Daisy: let's start a revolution
AlphaTheGreat: yes, burn our playstations
AlphaTheGreat: turn off our calculators
Daisy: blow up our blogs
Daisy: i'll be your sugar momma
AlphaTheGreat: that's a whole lot of sugar
Daisy: your baby ain't sweet like mine
AlphaTheGreat: she's got saucce or sauce
AlphaTheGreat: depending on what region you live in
AlphaTheGreat: I think the United States should switch to "ebonics" as the national language
Daisy: that would be dope, yo. Represent.
AlphaTheGreat: you nah whut I mean, yo
Daisy: Daisy = not down... esp. in world where ebonics is national language
AlphaTheGreat: its like we be talking and sh*t, and I be all like writin'
Daisy: Daisy = getting beat up on the playground everyday in world where ebonics is national language
AlphaTheGreat: Alpha = burned at the stake, and stoned for her inept ability to speak proper
Daisy: word. I dig.
Daisy: um, 50's slang = not ebonics
AlphaTheGreat: you will be burned at the stake with me
Daisy: um, yes. I will be first to go
AlphaTheGreat: ok, back to work
Daisy: do you have poster board?
AlphaTheGreat: a mullet on me, a mullet on you
AlphaTheGreat: so catchy - needs to be a song
AlphaTheGreat: what do you need poster board for?
Daisy: We need to make a sign for the Rally that says "I believe"
AlphaTheGreat: um. or we could just tattoo it to our forheads
AlphaTheGreat: ok back to work
Daisy: Trippi, the campaign manager (yes that's his real name) had signs in Seattle this weekend that said "you gotta believe"
Daisy: so we need signs that say "I believe"
AlphaTheGreat: well, I "believe" that his name is Trippi
Daisy: I want to change my name to Daisy Trippi... or Trippi Daisy... maybe he'll marry me.
AlphaTheGreat: I want to marry a guy with the last name Baby
AlphaTheGreat: or maybe something french like Bebe'
AlphaTheGreat: Alpha Bebe'
Daisy: Love it! I think you should adopt it immediately.
AlphaTheGreat: that will be my stage name
AlphaTheGreat: my stripper name
Daisy: your drag queen name?
AlphaTheGreat: ok, seriously bye.. um

2003-08-25T11:24:00.000-04:00

Because I know you care...
Drew Bennett = Titans top receiver Saturday night!!!!
3 receptions for 52 yards... I'm telling you, he's the "go-to" guy this year! Keep an eye on him (I will marry the man)! Titans are having a kick-ass pre-season. I just hope it rolls over into the regular season...

Dave was last night in the Meadowlands and again tonight... I originally didn't have tickets for Sunday night, but was very happy to have met a fellow warehouser who offered to take me with him last night! Had a blast! It was a good show, we had a great seats and good company... what more can you ask for (other than no traffic in the Lincoln Tunnel)? Am going again tonight and can't wait... am also flying to Nashville in 2 weeks for that show... yes, I have a problem.

Dave Matthews Band
Sunday, August 24, 2003
Continental Airlines Arena - NJ

Don’t Drink the Water
Fool To Think
Grace Is Gone
#41
Everyday
One Sweet World
Bartender
Help Myself
I Did It
Crush
You Never Know
Pay For What You Get
When The World Ends
Stay
__________________

Grey Street
What You Are

I spent all weekend flyering NYC for Dean for America. If you're in the NYC area, come to the Rally Tuesday night in Bryant Park... starts at 8:30PM! Help take back America!

I'm tired... am making plans to stay in bed all Labor Day weekend... am sooooo tired...
*yawn*
It's Monday morning... blah.

2003-08-19T16:30:00.000-04:00

How to make love stay:

1. Tell love you are going to the Junior's Deli on Flatbush Avenue in Brooklyn to pick up a cheesecake, and if love stays, it can have half. It will stay.

2. Tell love you want a memento of it and obtain a lock of its hair. Burn the hair in a dime-store incense burner with yin/yang symbols on three sides. Face southwest. Talk fast over the burning hair in a convincingly exotic language. Remove the ashes of the burnt hair and use them to paint a mustache on your face. Find love. Tell it you are someone new. It will stay.

3. Wake love up in the middle of the night. Tell it the world is on fire. Dash to the bedroom window and pee out of it. Casually return to bed and assure love that everything is going to be all right. Fall asleep. Love will be there in the morning.

- From Still Life With Woodpecker by Tom Robbins

How do I make love stay?
I take love to Six Flags and put it on a rollercoaster ride and tell it to keep its hands, feet, and all loose articles inside the car. I buckle it in and check to make sure it's nice and secure. I scream with delight on the upsidedown turns and try not to throw up all over it on the long straight drops. It appreciates this. Love will be there when the ride is over.

How do you make love stay?

2003-08-18T09:10:00.000-04:00

Um, can we say - STALKER????

Maybe this relationship isn't as healthy as I thought...

2003-08-17T06:17:00.000-04:00

5 Second Blog While I'm Waiting For My Pizza To Cool
6:06 am
long night behind me.

Although we all know how fond I am of clowns (i love you Ronald), I've never been a very good juggler myself.
But here's the little Daisy with 3 balls up in the air hoping they don't all come crashing down on her.

Kitty on my foot and I want to touch it.

Go Titans way to win another one.

So I went to a sports bar tonight to see the game...
Daisy: Somebody put Drew Bennett in the game!
Defense! Can I get some defense boys???????
Throw a pick....... INTERCEPTION!!!!!
Go! Go! Go! TOUCHDOWN!!!!!!!

Random Sports Bar Guy #1: Uh, didn't somebody tell her it's the pre-season?????

Daisy: Uh, yeah. Thanks.
GO TITANS!!!!!!!!

Pizza gone... going to bed.

nite-nite.

2003-08-15T13:03:00.000-04:00

And Stars Fell on New York City Last Night
It was a long, hot, and sweaty night last night (not in a good way either). But no air conditioning aside, it was a truly beautiful night... for once, the stars shined brightly overhead. I felt like I was back in the countryside in Tennessee. I could see Orion and the Big Dipper and thousands of other stars of which I'll never know their names. My phone didn't ring. There was no television to stare blankly at all night and no pressing emails to respond to. There were cold beers and ice cream cones to salvage from the heat. There was a candlelit dinner and long conversations on the stoop with my incredible roommates. We sent the boy out for "supplies" and he came back with bags of doritos, cold drinks, ice cream, and a flashlight! He's the hunter & gatherer type. I don't know where he found the food, but we were glad that he did! Way to provide for your women! I guess it could have been worse. So, we lost some food and we were pretty miserably hot... but it was the first time this summer that we'd all actually spent time together without having a million other places to go, people to see, or things to do. Time stood still and for once it was just a lazy hot summer night (for those of us not still stuck in elevators or sleeping on the sidewalks of Times Square, that is).

Dear Energy,
Like I was saying, just because you had a bad day doesn't mean you have the right to take it out on all the rest of us. You made me miss the Indigo Girls and for that you owe me big time! No seriously, I miss you. Please come back to me. I promise I'll never take you for granted again! I'll wine you and dine you. You'll see. Things will be different this time. I promise. Just come back to me...
Love Always,
Your hot and sweaty little flower

2003-08-14T15:11:00.000-04:00

I Wish I May, I Wish I Might
I have had many inquiries (ok, just one but you're going to hear about it anyway) as to what the wish that was granted was...

About a year ago I had a little extra time on my hands and I decided that I was tired of sitting infront of a television screen rotting my brain with all of the muck that is filtered through all of those cable tv stations. So, I got up off my keester and made a list of organizations for whom I wanted to volunteer. The thousands of people who were so motivated to volunteer after September 11th have started to disappear, but there are so many organizations out there that still need our help. It shouldn't take a national tragedy for us to see that there are people out there who need our help every single day of the year. Tragedy shouldn't have to be shoved in our faces on the news every night for us to find compassion in our hearts for others. We need people with a sense of social responsibilty now more than ever.

The organization on the top of my list was the Make-a-Wish Foundation. This is one of the most amazing organizations and volunteering for them has been one of the most rewarding experiences of my life. I get to be a real-life fairy godmother... ok, I prefer to be seen as a real life fairy princess who grants wishes instead of a fairy godmother... I'm too young and hip to be a fairy godmother anyway. I get to meet with these amazing children and their families and I get to see their smiles and hear their laughter and it humbles me to the core. To see children who are dealing with such huge burdens still be able to smile and be happy gives me perspective that you just can't find anywhere else on earth. And I get to be the one to tell these amazing kids, "I can make your wish come true!" Their faces light up, their eyes twinkle brighter than all of the stars in the whole galaxy combined, and my heart sings!

This weekend I got to tell another very special little girl that her wish was coming true... and I wouldn't trade getting to see the look on her face for a million dollars.

So go volunteer. Now. You won't regret it. I promise.

www.wish.org

2003-08-13T12:36:00.000-04:00

Have you ever felt so Freakin' annoyed with yourself that all you wanted to do was scream until your throat exploded? Ever had one of those days that left you so pissed off you just wanted to cry until your eyes popped out? Ever completely lost perspective and felt on the verge of a nervous break-down? Ever just wanted to hurl f-yous and go-to-hells at everyone and everything that came across your path? Ever have a friend that didn't think you were crazy for this, understood exactly where you were coming from and yelled obscenities with you at the top of her lungs, took you out for margaritas, and made you laugh so hard you almost peed your pants and forgot what a bad mood you were supposed to be in??? Ever seen a guy stroking himself on the westside highway? (ok, so I could've lived without that last one last night... what is with these people and nudity on the west side? That's twice in one week. I'm staying on the east side from now on. You people are crazy!)

Quote of the Day:
"How can men be such lummoxes, such wads of Juicy Fruit on the soles of our ballet slippers and still feel so good?" ~Tom Robbins

2003-08-12T16:32:00.000-04:00

Lookin' out on the morning rain
...(Ah-ooo)...
I used to feel so uninspired
...(Ah-ooo)...
And when I knew I had to face another day
...(Ah-ooo)...
Lord it made me feel so tired.

SOMEBODY MAKE IT STOP RAINING!
That's an order.

Weekend in numbers:
Hours spent at home in my own apartment:1
Models I molested on the dance floor: 2
Crablegs consumed: 25 (estimation)
Cocktails consumed: 4,000 (estimation)
Ron sightings: 1
Hours of sleep I managed to get in between partying: 5
Eyeballs scratched out by El Gato: 1
Number of football games I wanted to watch: 1
Number of football games I wanted to watch that were being shown in NYC: 0
Football games won by the TN Titans: 1 (YAY!)
Number of catches by my favorite wide receiver: 2 (I love you Drew Bennett)
Phone calls received from boys that I didn't think were going to call me: 2
Phone calls received from Drew Bennett: 0
Hours I spent working on Law School applications: 0
Hours I should have spent working on Law School applications: at least 4
Hours of this weekend that I regret that I spent partying instead of working on Law School applications: 0
Wishes Granted: 1

2003-08-08T11:23:00.000-04:00

What a Guy!
This is what happens when McDonalds opens 24 hours in the city that never sleeps... Ron is such an amazing conversationalist.

and then you don't write, you don't call... Oh, Ron.

Oh Baby!
I talked to my sister last night and she said that she can feel the baby moving now. That must be so weird to feel something alive and moving inside of you. I haven't decided yet whether or not I want kids of my own, but I am very excited to be becoming an auntie for the first time. Everytime I think of myself having kids I have this vision of the Volkswagon commercial where the little kid drops a cookie on the floor and the dad says, "5 second rule. Pick it up! Pick it up! That cookie's still good!" When I was at my grandparents house in May I had to go to the grocery store so I volunteered to take my little 4 year old cousin with me. We came home with the things we had been sent for, but there was also one extra bag filled with chips and ice cream and cookies and chocolate.
My mom and my aunts all started yelling at me, "Daisy, you can't just buy him whatever he wants. Look at all this junk food. Why didn't you tell him no?"
Daisy: "This stuff isn't for him. He didn't ask for anything. This is all mine."

Then to entertain him I gave everyone Star Wars names and started this whole scenario where Grandpa was the bad Darth Vader and I was Princess Daisy. I guess I got a little carried away though because he very curtly reminded me, "This is just PRETEND. It's not REAL." Ah yes, thanks kid.

Oh, and then I taught him some pretty funny little tricks, got him to start throwing acorns at my uncle, and other very obnoxious things that I can't get away with because I'm too big. But it sure was funny watching him do them.

So, I don't know how good of an aunt I'll be... chocolate cake for breakfast? I don't see why not. It's got all the good stuff: milk, eggs, flour... but this kid is going to LOVE me! If I can ever convince my sister to leave me alone with the little thing... I think she has her doubts.

And again, I am still banned from the baby naming committee. My neices and nephews are going to love me, but my own kids will hate me for their names alone I am sure! Isn't that right little Django Blaze???

Liar, Liar, Pants on fire!
Ok, yes. I am a big fat liar. I said recently that I was going to let the dead horse alone and stop beating him senseless, but I lied. I'm going to keep beating this dead horse until he gets up and says, "leave me the hell alone!" Yes, that's what it's going to take. I'm not going away that easily. *commences beating*

But why all of this senseless beating of dead horses? Because... "Il y a des illusions qui sont comme la lumière du jour; quand on les perd, tout diparaît avec elles." Even if they are nothing but illusions to begin with.

And in other news...
I am finished house sitting today so that means going back to the land of 3 roommates and small attic apartment. So long four-story house. So long air-conditioning. So long piano. So long backyard and barbecue. So long front porch. So long King-size bed. So long walking around the house naked. So long off-street parking. So long peace and quiet. So long HBO. So long high speed cable. I will miss you terribly.

Plans for this weekend include Endless Crab Legs, the first FOOTBALL GAME of the pre-season (you have NO IDEA how happy this makes me! Go TITANS! I love you Drew Bennett!), dancing, dancing, dancing, and granting a very special wish to a very special little girl. All in all it should be some pretty good times!

2003-08-06T13:16:00.000-04:00

This ain't no disco...this ain't no country club either...
The Tuesday Night Music Club (aka harmonica lessons) started yesterday and I must say that I am a natural. Other than the fact that I could have a more personable teacher (I thought he was blind at first because he didn't look at me for the first 10 minutes - it's only a half-hour lesson), I am very excited about learning to play the harmonica. I called JL after my lesson and he was very amused with me, "Daisy, only you would say - I have a harmonica, I think I'll take lessons." Well how else am I going to get good at it? I don't even know how to hold the silly thing. Actually, my teacher was a bit amused with me as well. I guess he doesn't get a lot of harmonica students.
Teacher: "So why the harmonica?"
Daisy: "I've always wanted to play an instrument that I can carry around in my pocket. Since this seriously limits my options, I chose the harmonica."
I can now play Mary Had a Little Lamb and Row, Row, Row Your Boat.
Look out Bob Dylan!

The Bachelorette
Well, summer is winding down along with the summer season of the Reality Dating Shows... The beginning of this season was filled with promise and excitement only to end in disappointment and disenchantment. Among the cast of characters there were a few nice guys, an extremely hott cowboy, and a few inevitable sleaze bags, but there was also someone who I really thought was going to be different... sincere, gentlemen, intelligent, charming, and handsome. And maybe he still is all these things... just not to me. He had so much promise and so much potential, which is why I hate feeling this way now. I'm not sad or angry, just disappointed that he didn't turn out to be the guy I thought he was. I had hoped that he might see something in me that was worth taking a chance on... I had hoped that he was as passionate and adventuresome as he seemed... I had hoped that I could dazzle him with my smile and make him interested in knowing me as much as I wanted to get to know him... I played the game and now I guess I'm throwing in the towel. I am accepting defeat. You don't have to tell me (or not tell me as the case may be) twice. I think I've beat this dead horse for long enough. You made your decision and it's obvious that you didn't pick me. Maybe next season...

Quote of the Day:
"Tilli stroked her Chihuahua. Max's heart made a sound like the sleighbells on Mrs. Santa Claus's dildo."
~Still Life With Woodpecker by Tom Robbins

2003-08-04T15:08:00.000-04:00

A New York City Weekend
It went by in a blur and I only have digital photos to remind me that it even happened. Hey, Hey, I'm a club kid now! I've always been a bar girl, but thanks to Alphababy... I am learning to appreciate the fine art of guest lists, free drinks, and dancing with Jade Starling! "Catch me now I'm falling." Now all I want is sleep. Sleep I say! New pics are posted from this weekend's fun and games. And yes, we really did dance with Jade Starling... 80's pop stars rock!

Speaking of Alphababy... I'd like to introduce you all to the hottest new thing in the Blog World: Alphababy! Stop by Alpha's World and say hello! It's a great place to visit... but I wouldn't want to live there! Coming soon: Alpha's World the bar, Alpha's World the gift shop, and Alpha the washed-up 80's pop rocker promoter. If you don't know her already, you should. She's the next big thing! (NB: just don't ever tell her who you have a crush on because she'll probably sell you out to a major newspaper. you've been warned.)

2003-07-31T17:02:00.000-04:00

Say Cheeeze!
Whoo-hoo. New pictures are up from the Scary Spice Birthday Bash... check it out!
Happy Happy, Joy Joy! Don't you just love birthdays?

I am leaving work now and going to sign myself up for some harmonica lessons! Nope, I've never played before, but I've always wanted to learn. So, I figure there's no time like the present! I got a shiny new blues harp for my birthday and now I'm going to learn how to put it to good use. Maybe someday I'll play you all a Delta Lullabye... Until then, just be glad you're not one of my roommates - who are going to have to put up with a lot of crap before it gets good. Sorry guys.

...well I pulled my harpoon outta my dirty red bandana, I was playin' soft while Bobby sang the blues...

2003-07-30T16:45:00.000-04:00

What I Did On My Summer Vacation

This summer I flew to Nashville, Tennessee to see my family and long-lost friends. My friends might argue that they are not "long-lost" at all. In fact, they will probably tell you that they know exactly where they are and it was I who abandoned them. And to this end they would be somewhat correct. It was I who left them 2 years ago, lured away by the bright lights of the big city. There is definitely something to be said, though, for friends as amazing as mine. They are always there to welcome me home - even if I've only been gone 2 months- they are there when the boat pulls in like I've been gone for 50 years. And we pick up right where we left off as if not even a moment has passed between us. They make me drink way too much and they make me spend way too much money going out to eat and partying, but I love them anyway. (ok, so they might also argue that I've got this whole thing backwards, but hey - that's what friends are for. right?)

I heard some great music in the country music capitol of the world and most of it wasn't even country music. You'd be surprised.

I drove down to southern Alabama and lounged in the Gulf of Mexico for 5 days soaking up the sun and throwing down at legendary honky-tonk biker bars straddling the state line. I ate crab legs, won a game of trivial pursuit in sudden death overtime, bought a really cute skirt, and made my own fried pickles!

I read the DaVinci Code. Please go read this book immediately - I can't say enough how much I enjoyed it. It's one of those books that really makes you want to know more. So now I've started "the History of God." I am not a religious person (in fact I don't believe in organized religion at all), but I do like to be able to talk intelligently on the subject and say that I've made an informed decision. Anyway, it's a great book and I highly recommend that you read it. Right now.

I had a date with a super-cool guy. He picked me up, he opened doors for me, AND he paid! As I realize that this will probably never happen again I am trying to stifle my level of enthusiasm. This seems to fall in the pattern I have set of falling for guys that live really far away. Hmmm, I wonder why this might be so?

I picked a name for my sister's new baby... since I am convinced she is having a boy I didn't bother with a girl's name. Django Blaze. After sharing my suggestion, I was banned from future "name the baby" committee meetings.

I also bought a new bra, and I have to say... Victoria, you have just outdone yourself this time! It is the most amazing thing! No bra = no boobs. Victoria's New Super Sexy Push-up Bra = BIG BOOBS and CLEAVAGE! Now this is a secret you should have shared years ago! I couldn't stop staring at them all night long! J.L. even thought I had gotten a boob job while I was home! Yeah! Have new favorite bra!!!!

And that was my summer vacation in a nutshell... visited too many bars to list, shared too many laughs to recount, and spent so many special moments with so many special people that I hold close to my heart!

Home where my thought's escaping
Home where my music's playing
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me...

2003-07-28T14:46:00.000-04:00

Back from vacation... back to spending hours infront of my computer screen... back to updating regularly... back to the "Real World."

It was fun while it lasted!

2003-07-24T12:07:00.000-04:00

Nashville, Tennessee
The only city in the world where you can see Ben Folds and the Wooten Brothers in the same night for a whopping $5. Now these guys are some bad-ass motherfu......

To anyone who ever offers to set me up on a blind date:
It will do wonders for my level of enthusiasm if you would explain upfront how "Mr. Perfect" also happens to be the most eligible bachelor in town. Now we're talking! This could get interesting...

"Rock this bitch!"

2003-07-23T15:58:00.000-04:00

EastMountainSouth

I have been accosted everywhere I go today by this group. Every shop, every restaurant, even in my car, I hear their voices. I get the picture. I bought the cd. You can leave me alone now!

Seriously, I think I am in love. This group is great! Do yourself a favor and buy the cd. Really.

2003-07-19T12:07:00.000-04:00

She Burns
You can't see her light
until all that's really left of her is gone
Her illusion must escape you,
As she burns right on through the night into the dawn.

Only once in your life will you find beauty so pure.
Her warm glow embraces you; her mystery engulfs you.
Like a brightly burning comet,
She wanders amongst the stars - alone.

And you can't see her light
Until all that's really left of her is gone.

News Update:
If you have a secret crush on someone and one of your best friends starts running her mouth about it, make sure the person she's talking to isn't a reporter for the New York Post! Horror of all horrors... I have been exposed - on the front page of the Entertainment section! For those who know me, you can find the article here. Am mortified! Ok, so the article doesn't mention him by name, but believe me it's not hard to figure out. In fact many people have already done so, calling to tell me how they read about my crush on "insert name here" in the NY Post. Why? Why? Why?

I hear you laughing... and it's not funny!

2003-07-17T13:06:00.000-04:00

Just a short post to say that I have not been abducted by little green men... I am enjoying chickory coffee and hot beignets down on the gulf.

Wish you were here...

Parting Wisdom:
Chasing an oyster with tequila is not a good idea.
Chasing that tequila with a big swig of Merlot is an even worse idea.

2003-07-15T15:51:00.000-04:00

Sitting on the lake in a little red boat full of friends and laughter, watching the storm roll in. An airplane passes overhead and for the first time in a long, long time I'm not wishing that I was on it.

Tiensey: "I'm glad you're home."
Daisy: "Me too."

Here my days are filled with cookouts, honkytonks, bowls full of sunshine, fried pickles, and margaritas on the patio... waking up to my mother's voice in the morning, talking to my unborn baby (my sis is now pregnant), hanging with my little brother who seemed to have turned into an adult since I left, having dinner with 15 of my closest friends to welcome me home, seeing Alison Krauss and Union Station at the Grand Ole Opry, driving by places from my past filled with old memories that make me laugh and a few that make me cry, awkward hellos from people I never imagined running into, sweet kisses from someone I never should have been kissing, drunken flirting with really cute cowboys outside of the "world famous" country bar, catching up with old friends, sipping wine with my girls, and laughing like I haven't laughed since the last time I was home.

The clouds opened up, the lightening crashed down, the thunder boomed:
Woody: "Let's go swimming in the rain."
Daisy: "I sure have missed you!"

2003-07-12T12:39:00.000-04:00

You'll have to excuse me I'm not at my best,
I've been gone for 2 days - I've been drunk since I left.
These so called vacations will soon be my death;
I'm so sick from the drink, I need home for a rest.

I LOVE Nashville Tennessee;

I have the best friends in the whole world;

I picked up a real cowboy last night;

And I'm still drunk at noon from the night before.

Buckle your seatbelts ladies and gentlemen and hold on to all hats, glasses, and other loose articles because this trip is going to be a doooooosy!

2003-07-10T15:59:00.000-04:00

"Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me."

Where my LOVES lie waiting... my mom and the Captain and my sissy and the Pfeif and my new baby and Tracy Lou Lou and Tiensey and TomboBacos who like guacamole on tacos and the Juice Man!

I am heading down to Nashville, Tennessee where no one has to steal their kisses from me!!!

Woo Hoo!

I also just had a very explicit daydream that I was making out with Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but that is neither here nor there... (I think that's your cue...)

2003-07-10T11:42:00.000-04:00

"This is to be alone,
this, this is solitude!"
~Byron

I took a much needed break over the 4th of July weekend and headed out on the road - just me, my trusty mitsubishi, a bikini, a copy of Kerouac's Dharma Bums, and a borrowed tent. (mental note: a flashlight would also make a good camping accoutrement) I was southbound, searching for sunshine and solitude...

And that's exactly what I found. It was so liberating to be out on my own. Not that I'm not out on my own everyday, but traveling and camping alone gives a sense of freedom and independence that vaccuming my apartment, grocery shopping and doing the laundry just don't provide. It was the best feeling to lie down in my tent at night, alone under the stars, just me and my thoughts and the crickets chirping. I had a lot of time to think (what I do best). I didn't realize just how confined I've been feeling lately until I laid down in my tent on Misty Mountain in Charlottesville that first night and took a deep breath and realized that I've been holding my breath for way too long now. Sometimes I just need to get away for awhile and be alone. It's weird because I've never been depressed. Even with all that I've been through with the death of my father and dealing with the crazy people for whom I seem to be an easy target, I never let myself feel that way. I do, however, often feel the need to get away and to be alone. This is my way of dealing with the craziness and stress in my life and of keeping in control. I need these moments of solitude to clear my head, to keep myself thinking straight, to get back to the truth. Like the saying goes, "you can't see the forrest for the trees." When I am alone I can see myself for who I am and not for who others want me to be. I can get a larger perspective on my life and my place in the world that I can't see while I'm living it. I can see where I am veering off track and I can set myself straight again. It's these moments of solitude that not everyone understands, but that mean so much to me.

I was up in the mountains in Charlottesville and down on the beach in southern VA... One morning I sat on the beach with a cup of coffee in my hand and watched the sun come up over the ocean. Sitting on the beach infront of the endless ocean and vast horizon, I always get a sense of just how small I am in this world - a sense of something so much bigger than myself. I am not a religious person, but sitting on that beach with the sand between my toes and the waves crashing against the shore, I believed in something - I believed in hope and I believed in the great potential of the human spirit.

This is what I took back with me from my journey southward... that along with a nice tan and a bellybutton full of sand!

2003-07-08T13:49:00.000-04:00

Rock Gods and Generals - Part IV:
Not being a writer, I often find that my own words just aren't enough to properly express what I am thinking. There are so many people out there that have said it so much better than I ever could. So I will again revert to the genius that is Paul Auster to say what I am thinking right now... but first, I want to say thank you to a certain "rock god" (aka: new crush, that sexy voice, hott stuff - for those of you following along) for being such a gentleman, for being so charming, and for his wonderful hospitality. I don't know why he humors me so, but I am glad he does. He said that he saw in me a truly free spirit - I think he sees the reflection of his own shining free spirit.

"Yet the feeling lingered that there was more innate goodness in him than in others, that some unquenchable fire was keeping him alive, that he was more truly himself than I could ever hope to be... there was something so attractive about him that you always wanted him beside you, as if you could live within his sphere and be touched by what he was... you felt there was a secret core in him that could never be penetrated, a mysterious center of hiddenness."

This is what draws me to him and excites an ardent desire to participate in his mystery.

2003-07-02T20:59:00.000-04:00

From the New York Trilogy by Paul Auster
"Every life is inexplicable, I kept telling myself. No matter how many facts are told, no matter how many details are given, the essential thing resists telling... We all want to be told stories, and we listen to them in the same way we did when we were young. We imagine the real story inside the words, and to do this we substitute ourselves for the person in the story, pretending that we can understand him because we understand ourselves. This is a deception. We exist for ourselves, perhaps, and at times we even have a glimmer of who we are, but in the end we can never be sure, and as our lives go on, we become more and more opaque to ourselves, more and more aware of our own incoherence. No one can cross the boundary into another - for the simple reason that no one can gain access to himself."

2003-07-01T13:10:00.000-04:00

Another lovely Monday night at Bryant Park. The old crush and I saw "The Lady from Shanghai" with Rita Hayworth and Orson Welles. Every time I go I learn a new trick to a satisfying B-Park Film Festival experience. This time I learned that it is wise to bring plastic covering for the ground under your blanket or possibly wind up with a very wet butt.

I also learned that:
*A lot of girls have no qualms about showing their thongs in public.
*Most of these girls should have some serious qualms with this.
*If you bring a laptop and get bored with the movie you can always check your email and play solitaire.
*There are some really nice New Yorkers out there... gotta give a shout out to the couple next to us who offered us a spot on their waterproof blanket and saved me from being one of those soggy butts!
*I hate NY traffic, but that's a given.
*I reiterate, there's no better way to spend a Monday night than in the park with a bottle of wine, an old movie, and a good friend.

I bugged on my July 4th plans with the girls and have decided to set off on my own for an undisclosed location somewhere in the south... undisclosed only because I am not quite sure myself where I will end up. I think I'm heading for Charlottesville, VA first and then who knows after that. I want to check out the UVA campus and the town. Maybe to the beach, maybe to the mountains... maybe I'll head west and just never turn around. I am actually worried that this might be a valid concern. I have had the urge lately to just pack it up and head on to the next thing. I see my exit coming and I keep driving into the sunset to a new life - a new adventure. I like it where I am now (I mean, I am not unhappy here), but being the wandering soul that I am I can't stay put for long. I feel that the time is coming to move on. I need new challenges, new faces, new fears, new ground to explore. Being the sensible girl that I am though, responsibilty will get the better of me and I'll be right back here in NY Tuesday morning bright and early ready to continue the grind. But I just can't escape these thoughts that wake me in the middle of the night, calling me away...

The old crush is leaving tonight to go stay with other friends... will be sad to see him go. It was fun reminiscing the good old days with him. He makes me miss playing music and I have even wondered if I should have stuck it out and finished my degree in music. I look at his life and I think, "this could've been me. I could be doing all of these things now." But then again, I would've missed out on all the amazing other things that this life has allowed me to do. And I wouldn't trade those experiences for the entire world. For me, this crush represents a whole part of my life that seems so far away from where I am now. Being with him brings back a piece of the girl I used to be, the girl I was afraid I had forgotton. She wasn't as confident and self-assured, but there was a naiveté and sweetness about her that I hope I can hold onto long after he has gone. Sometimes being with someone from your past is like looking into a mirror after having only seen your reflection in street puddles and store windows. You tend to notice things about yourself that were previously distorted or blurred. In writing and even in just contemplating the past, it is hard to keep from giving a revisionist account of how it all came about, but if you bring the past into the present it seems easier to remember it how it really was. The truth seems much closer to the surface and not buried beneath reflection and retrospect. The truth is right there - holding your hand and brushing the hair from your cheek and watching you sleep and giving you a hug goodbye, only to buried again as you drive away and watch the last speck of him fade into the horizon.

2003-06-30T11:05:00.000-04:00

Monday, Monday
I had a wonderful weekend. I drove out to CT Friday night for the show, but alas it was cancelled at the last minute. Just my luck. I was pretty disappointed because I thought the NYC show might be cancelled too and then I wouldn't get to see my old crush again. So, I called him and was assured that the show was on for Saturday night.

I drove out to the beach in CT on Saturday and spent all day at the beach... the first Saturday with no rain in 2 months!!! It was so refreshing. Now am sunburned. Yes, quite refreshing indeed. I had some excellent tunage for the drive. In fact one of the best driving mixes EVER! Thanks Eelnahs!

It was the roomy's B-day so we had a big BBQ to celebrate. I left before the cake to go to the city and meet the boy for a drink before the show. It was great to see him again... hadn't changed a bit. He says that I am all grown up now. It's been almost 6 years since we've seen each other... I guess I was pretty young then.

Excerpt from our first meeting:
I am walking down 45th street to meet the crush and spot him infront of the restaurant.
Crush: (realizes the girl walking towards him is me) Jesus Christ
Daisy: (getting closer) I hope that was a good "Jesus Christ"
Crush: Yeah, you look great! It's so good to see you.
Daisy: (smiles brightly and gives him a hug... mission accomplished)

After a few drinks he started spilling college secrets. I studied commercial music performance for awhile in college. I also happened to be the only female in the instrumental portion of the program. Being the cute little sax chick, apparently I had a larger fan club than I thought. The boy told me that the guys in the program had nicknamed me "hot lips." Never to my face of course - but still good for the ego.

Anyway, to make a long story short - the boy was supposed to leave after the show to drive back home with the rest of the band but decided to stay in NY for a few extra days and fly back at the end of the week. He's staying with me for 2 days and then staying with another friend for a few days. It's nice to have him here and there is definitely still chemistry there, but I think for both of us it's more about reliving the nostalgia of the past than anything else. Even so, it's nice to spend time together even if it is for old time's sake.

2003-06-27T10:00:00.000-04:00

End-of-Week Status Report

1.) I have an old crush (who I will see tonight for the first time in many, many years). We got together briefly back in college, but the timing wasn't right for either of us. It will be interesting to see the chemistry, if any, that remains. It was a very long and subtle courtship, which made it all the more exciting when we finally got together...... foreshadowing...
2.) I also have a new crush. This crush has a very sexy voice, which I only get to hear on my answering machine. I imagine he looks damn good in his black leather pants. I love to listen to him sing and I would love to feel his calves... if that was an invitation.
3.) My car got hit yesterday by the incompetent roofing people working at the neighbor's house. Must be repaired - at roofing company's expense.
4.) Am playing house for the summer. I moved into my new summer home - house-sitting/cat sitting for friends. Is v. v. nice not to have a zillion roommates for a change - even if it is only for a month. I am getting a good dose of what it's like to be a real adult having to take care of something other than myself for a change.
5.) I am not ready to be a real adult. This fact is reaffirmed every time I walk down the cereal isle at the grocery store. You mean I can have any box that I want??? I can have them all???
6.) However, I love the cats.
7.) Am working on a new WISH for a 3-year-old little girl with a rare cancer. Her one desire is to see Mickey Mouse. Her beautiful smile gave me an intense dose of perspective that makes me feel like a foolish little girl worrying about my own "problems."
8.) Had plans for July 4th weekend, but have decided that it might be better if I just go away by myself for a few days - throw the tent in the back of the car and drive south til I find a nice place to pitch it. I am not in the mood to be around 6 billion people in a quasi-spring break atmosphere.
9.) Negative forces are bringing me down... driving me crazy... making me want to hurt them.
10.) I started having a secret affair (of the non-sexual nature) with best guy pal. We've been sneaking around to see each other in order to avoid being around these other very negative forces who always seem to appear. This makes me feel guilty. He feels guilty because his girlfriend seems to think it unnatural that we spend so much time together and that we are too old to be having boy/girl slumber parties. I don't like lying and I don't like sneaking around, but it's either that or be miserable. The truth would only hurt people's feelings and it's not like we're doing anything wrong. We just want to enjoy our buzz without having it blugeoned to death on the kitchen floor. Is that too much to ask???
11.) Day 11 --- no cigarettes. And I'm not even being bitchy. Ok, maybe just a little.
12.) The boss man returns next week so I should probably get some real work done today.
13.) When I was little I thought my Sunday school teacher was God, now I am pretty sure that it really doesn't matter.

2003-06-25T11:10:00.000-04:00

"Never trust a man...
why didn't I read those articles in Self Magazine more carefully I probably could have avoided this -
The man is married OK.
Married, a thief and a lousy lover too
I definitely should have resisted.
I'm squishing up my baby bumblebee
Won't Gloria Steinem be so proud of me
I'm squishing up my baby bumblebee
OohWee it's all over me" ~Meryn Cadel

Why NYC Fucking Rocks on a Tuesday Night!
Hint: Gloria Steinem

This Tuesday night was not about daisy-eating, but about MAN-EATING as the DL21C presented Gloria Steinem and Carol Mosely Braun in their "Road to the White House" series. Granted, I am not the liberal, BS spouting, 60's throwback feminist that eats this shit up (ok, so I am a liberal, BS spouting, 60's throwback - just not an uber-feminist), but I rather enjoyed last night's festivities and geting to see Gloria Steinem speak in person. However, I believe they took the whole - shero, "I am woman hear me roar" - thing a little too far. Needless to say I won't be voting for CMB in the primary. Next week: The Reverand Al Sharpton. Have we truly run out of candidates for this series? I think the ultimate end to this estrogen-filled, feminist spouting evening was getting hit on by the married man at the bar. What a courageous guy, especially after all the feminist BS he had just heard to have the nerve to be a "typical" man. Did I let him buy me a drink? Of course I did - like I said, I am not an uber-feminist on a mission and I am also not ashamed to let a married man pay for my drinks. This is New York City after all and I am poor.

"The married man and the creditors notices mean nothing compared to the personal development I feel in my deep and centered heart."
Meryn Cadel

In even more exciting news...
I received my SASSY mug yesterday and boy is it sassy!!!! It is absolutely beautiful and I want to send a big hug and a big thank you to the sassy little punkin herself! YOU ROCK!

2003-06-24T12:58:00.000-04:00

Why New York City Fucking Rocks on a Monday Night
Hint: Paul Newman and Robert Redford

Ambling about the streets in the Lower East Side I headed over to JL’s for a coke and a toke. We lounged about for awhile enjoying the buzz then gathered our things and caught a taxi for Mid-town. The cab driver dropped us at 5th Avenue and 42nd street in front of the New York Public Library.

We walked around the side of the building towards Bryant Park. You know it’s officially summertime in NYC with the premiere of the Bryant Park Film Festival!!!

The lawn was packed with young 20-somethings and thirty-somethings with their picnic baskets and bottles of wine and beer. We searched for awhile for a spot to call home… in getting into the proper mood for the evening we wound up a little off-track and a bit late. We finally found a spot to lay down our blanket, stretch out, and wait for the sun to set on the city. I was sitting there listening in on the conversations around me and found the people of NY to be just fascinating. I am a bit of an eaves-dropper, especially when inebriated, but I love to watch and listen to other people. The couple next to us were obviously on some sort of first date (not much chemistry, though. Doubt he gets a second. Although I give him props for such a cool date). Anyway, the conversation went a little like this…
Guy: Have you ever been sky-diving?
Girl: No, it’s so scary. How about you, ever been?
Guy: No, but it’s on my list of things to do.
Hearing someone else say it I realized how ridiculous it sounds – a list of things “to do.” I don’t ever want to be that person with a list of things “to do.” I want to be the girl with the list of things I’ve DONE! So it’s settled. From now on I’m doing and I will never ever say to anyone, “that’s on my list of things to do.” No List.
The sun finally set and as soon as it was dark the big screen lit up for the Pre-amble to the Feature Film… Drip-Along Daffy! Western hero Daffy and Buddy Porky enter a lawless western town where Daffy goes head-to-head with Nasty Canasta.

After the cartoon the crowd gets up for “the dance” and then the film begins.
What could be cooler than an evening under the stars in Bryant Park with Paul Newman and Robert Redford??? It was none other than Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid!

It was so surreal with Robert Redford on the Big Screen, a drive-in atmosphere in the middle of the park, the sounds of New York City still going on all around you (sirens and horns honking), thousands of people cheering along the dynamic duo… so incredible.

Memorable moments:

Butch: What happened to the old bank? It was beautiful.
Guard: People kept robbing it.
Butch: That's a small price to pay for beauty.

Macon: Well, it looks like you just about cleaned everybody, fella - you haven't lost a hand since you got the deal. What's the secret of your success?
Sundance: (mono-syllabically) Prayer.
Macon: Let's just you and me play.

Butch: You know, when I was a kid, I always thought I was gonna grow up to be a hero.
Sundance: (pragmatically) Well, it's too late now.
Butch: What'd you say something like that for? You didn't have to say something like that.

Butch: I think we lost 'em. Do you think we lost 'em?
Sundance: No.
Butch: Neither do I.

Butch: When we get outside, when we get to the horses, just remember one thing. Hey, wait a minute!
Sundance: What?
Butch: You didn't see Lefors out there, did ya?
Sundance: Lefors? No.
Butch: (confidently) Good. For a moment there, I thought we were in trouble.

THE END

Don't leave me hanging Butch... what's the one thing????

A subway ride back to the Lower East Side and a Blue Nine burger later - I can’t think of a better way to spend a Monday night.

2003-06-23T15:38:00.000-04:00

Le chat n'est pas la - les souris dansent!
I am out enjoying the sunshine - while it lasts! So, here's a little story to tide you over... see if you can identify the symbolism.
Bisous, Ciao!

The Butterfly by Hans Christian Andersen

THERE was once a butterfly who wished for a bride, and, as may be supposed, he wanted to choose a very pretty one from among the flowers. He glanced, with a very critical eye, at all the flower-beds, and found that the flowers were seated quietly and demurely on their stalks, just as maidens should sit before they are engaged; but there was a great number of them, and it appeared as if his search would become very wearisome. The butterfly did not like to take too much trouble, so he flew off on a visit to the daisies. The French call this flower “Marguerite,” and they say that the little daisy can prophesy. Lovers pluck off the leaves, and as they pluck each leaf, they ask a question about their lovers; thus: “Does he or she love me?—Ardently? Distractedly? Very much? A little? Not at all?” and so on. Every one speaks these words in his own language. The butterfly came also to Marguerite to inquire, but he did not pluck off her leaves; he pressed a kiss on each of them, for he thought there was always more to be done by kindness.

“Darling Marguerite daisy,” he said to her, “you are the wisest woman of all the flowers. Pray tell me which of the flowers I shall choose for my wife. Which will be my bride? When I know, I will fly directly to her, and propose.”

But Marguerite did not answer him; she was offended that he should call her a woman when she was only a girl; and there is a great difference. He asked her a second time, and then a third; but she remained dumb, and answered not a word. Then he would wait no longer, but flew away, to commence his wooing at once. It was in the early spring, when the crocus and the snowdrop were in full bloom.

“They are very pretty,” thought the butterfly; “charming little lasses; but they are rather formal.”

Then, as the young lads often do, he looked out for the elder girls. He next flew to the anemones; these were rather sour to his taste. The violet, a little too sentimental. The lime-blossoms, too small, and besides, there was such a large family of them. The apple-blossoms, though they looked like roses, bloomed to-day, but might fall off to-morrow, with the first wind that blew; and he thought that a marriage with one of them might last too short a time. The pea-blossom pleased him most of all; she was white and red, graceful and slender, and belonged to those domestic maidens who have a pretty appearance, and can yet be useful in the kitchen. He was just about to make her an offer, when, close by the maiden, he saw a pod, with a withered flower hanging at the end.

“Who is that?” he asked.

“That is my sister,” replied the pea-blossom.

“Oh, indeed; and you will be like her some day,” said he; and he flew away directly, for he felt quite shocked.

A honeysuckle hung forth from the hedge, in full bloom; but there were so many girls like her, with long faces and sallow complexions. No; he did not like her. But which one did he like?

Spring went by, and summer drew towards its close; autumn came; but he had not decided. The flowers now appeared in their most gorgeous robes, but all in vain; they had not the fresh, fragrant air of youth. For the heart asks for fragrance, even when it is no longer young; and there is very little of that to be found in the dahlias or the dry chrysanthemums; therefore the butterfly turned to the mint on the ground. You know, this plant has no blossom; but it is sweetness all over,—full of fragrance from head to foot, with the scent of a flower in every leaf.

“I will take her,” said the butterfly; and he made her an offer. But the mint stood silent and stiff, as she listened to him. At last she said,—

“Friendship, if you please; nothing more. I am old, and you are old, but we may live for each other just the same; as to marrying—no; don’t let us appear ridiculous at our age.”

And so it happened that the butterfly got no wife at all. He had been too long choosing, which is always a bad plan. And the butterfly became what is called an old bachelor.

It was late in the autumn, with rainy and cloudy weather. The cold wind blew over the bowed backs of the willows, so that they creaked again. It was not the weather for flying about in summer clothes; but fortunately the butterfly was not out in it. He had got a shelter by chance. It was in a room heated by a stove, and as warm as summer. He could exist here, he said, well enough.

“But it is not enough merely to exist,” said he, “I need freedom, sunshine, and a little flower for a companion.”

Then he flew against the window-pane, and was seen and admired by those in the room, who caught him, and stuck him on a pin, in a box of curiosities. They could not do more for him.

“Now I am perched on a stalk, like the flowers,” said the butterfly. “It is not very pleasant, certainly; I should imagine it is something like being married; for here I am stuck fast.” And with this thought he consoled himself a little.

“That seems very poor consolation,” said one of the plants in the room, that grew in a pot.

“Ah,” thought the butterfly, “one can’t very well trust these plants in pots; they have too much to do with mankind.”

2003-06-22T22:09:00.000-04:00

The sun did not shine.
It was too wet to play.
So we sat in the house
All that cold, cold, wet day.

I sat there with Sally.
We sat there, we two.
And I said, "How I wish
We had something to do!"

Too wet to go out
And too cold to play ball.
So we sat in the house.
We did nothing at all.

So all we could do was to
Sit!
Sit!
Sit!
Sit!
And we did not like it.
Not one little bit.

Well that was Saturday, anyway. Saturday night I said to hell with it and went out in the rain. A few drinks later we didn't care how wet we had gotten. I am so bloody sick of this nasty weather. Next weekend I want sunshine and lots of it!

I got a call today from one of my bestfriend's boyfriend. We've gotten to be pretty good friends lately and he calls me when they're fighting to ask my advice or just to vent. Today he says to me, "I wish she was just like you Daisy. If only she were just like you - then everything would be perfect." I wasn't sure if that was an off-handed compliment or more of a slap in the face. In fact, it's not the first time I've been told this. However, I can't help but wonder - if this were true then why is it that these guys are always dating the emotional fuck-wit (aka: crazy girl) and complaining to me about it instead of the other way around?

This is what I've got so far...
**As much as a guy says that he wants to be with an intelligent woman, he hates being constantly wrong or feeling as if he isn't as smart.
**As much as a guy says that he wants to be with an ambitious woman, he's petrified of being left behind - of her choosing her career over him.
**As much as a guy wants to be with a strong, emotionaly stable woman, he needs to feel needed - to be leaned on - to be the stronger one. That's his role. "He thinks about calling her up on the phone for a chat, hesitates, and the decides against it. He doesn't want to seem weak, If she knew how much he needed her, he would begin to lose his advantage, and that wouldn't be good. The man must always be the stronger one." Paul Auster, The New York Trilogy (this might also start me in on the whole topic of boys and the telephone, but I digress.)
**As much as guys like the girl who can hang with the boys and watch the game, they don't want her to be their girl. Guys need something to call their own, something they don't share. For most, this is "the game." This is something they can do with the boys, or the boys and the cool chick at the bar screaming at the Ump - Offsides! Offsides! But this is their time away...
**As much as a guy wants a woman who is easy to talk to and will listen to all of his problems, he doesn't want this girl to be his girl because he would never want her to know all of his fears & insecurities the way I do.
**As much as a guy says that he wants to be with a beautiful and confident woman, he is afraid of never measuring up to her own expectations of him.

You can define your dream girl and you might even be lucky enough to find her one day. She might be everything you say you want in a woman. But when it comes right down to it, do you really know what you truly want? Because when she walks through your door you might be surprised to find that she's more of a woman than you could ever handle. So, be careful what you wish for.

2003-06-20T20:06:00.000-04:00

Was back to work today, feeling much better - still tired. I have come to realize that I almost enjoyed being sick when I was a child. Not the feeling like shit part, but growing up the middle child in a big family with working parents it wasn't often that I got all of the attention and was truly pampered and doted upon. I also realized that 2 good things came out of this bout with strep throat: 1.) I lost 4 pounds. An added bonus of not being able to swallow anything for 3 days. 2.) I haven't had a cigarette in 4 days. Am debating whether or not should take this wonderful opportunity to quit altogether. My pack was staring me down as I drove to work this morning, but I reisited the urge and still haven't had a smoke even though I am feeling better.

Another thing, I finally finished reading The Catcher in the Rye and I have to say, "I just don't get it." It was one of those books that I was supposed to read in high school but never got around to actually reading. So, I have recently decided to go back and read all of those classics that I cheated my way around 10 years ago (ie: The Sound and the Fury, The Great Gatsby, The Bell Jar). Everyone I talked to said that they LOVED The Catcher in the Rye and that they had read it 10 times or something crazy and that it was their favorite book. It took me forever to read and I just didn't get into it. Am I missing something? Do you have to be a prepubecent boy to truly appreciate it? Again I reiterate, am I missing something? Discuss.

I saw (during my leave of absence and tv smut time) that Oprah has resurrected her old book club. This summer's read: East of Eden by John Steinbeck. Now I have to say, I have never been one to do the whole Oprah book club thing, but I think I'm going to read this one. Not for the book club, yo. I would never... but it does seem to fall under that category of books I never read that I should have. If it's good enough for James Dean, it's good enough for me.

Lastly, for the NYC contingency... Carol Mosely Braun will be in town this Tuesday for the DL21C's "Road to the White House" series. She is being introduced by Gloria Steinem! What a night. I am so there!

2003-06-19T10:34:00.000-04:00

SICK DAY - PART II
Different day, same itinerary - only today I think I'll try a little less Oprah and Regis & Kelly and a little more Paul Auster. It's hard though because I am such a soap opera whore. I started watching Days of Our Lives when I was four and have been an addict ever since. My grandma babysat my sister and I after school when we were little and snack time was always during Days of Our Lives. Put something their mouths so they'll shutup and Grandma gets to see her show. I can't imagine letting 4 year olds watch this smut though. It got pretty bad when my college roommate and I would schedule our classes around the show. Senior year she introduced me to Passions and the Lopez-Fitzgeralds. We used to get drunk and play the theme song over and over pretending to be characters from the show. Bad. I've severed the tie since college, being a working girl and all. You know, I haven't seen the show in probably 6 months and I haven't missed a beat. It's the SAME story line!

I've been up for about 3 hours now. I think it's time for a nap...

2003-06-18T13:02:00.000-04:00

SICK DAY
Am blogging from home today - sick as a dog. May God strike down upon you with great vengence and furious anger ye who poisoned this flower with such a shitty virus. I can't eat or drink anything without wincing in pain. I have never had a sore throat this bad. I figure I probably got it from one of those little angels at my school... they're always hugging and kissing all over you. So I'm taking it easy at home today. I have a copy of "New York Trilogy" by Paul Auster, the latest Economist, my laptop computer, some tomato soup, the remote control, and a big bottle of antibiotics. Strep Throat be gone!

My mom called to check on me earlier. I regret being so far away from home when I am sick. I am such a baby when I get sick. I like to be taken care of. This is probably because my mom is a nurse and she always played that role so well. I was sick quite a bit when I was little and I can remember being in the emergency room and not letting any of the other nurses except my mom give me shots. I didn't trust them! She would sit up with me all night long and get me whatever I needed. Now I have to fix my own damn soup and get my own damn orange juice. Anyway, she made a comment about me getting sick so much lately because I work at a school and bring home everything that the little ones get. She said that she is much more healthy now that all of her kids are grown up and not bringing home everything they come in contact with at school, "little monsters." Escuse me? Did she just call us little monsters? Tell me how you really feel mom! I would be mad at her, but those little angels at my school are seeming more like little monsters at this point too. I'm going to take some more meds and put my sorry butt to bed.

2003-06-17T13:19:00.000-04:00

So you want to hear all about my trip to Vermont???

Armed with my basic roadtripping accoutrements (ie: straw cowboy hat, glam-girl sunglasses, L's greatest mix cd, "rock god's" new cd, 2 packages of skittles, a Dr. Pepper, and a Cracker Barrel road map), I headed north for the Green Mountain State.

But what was so great about this little roadtrip?
You mean besides being back on the open road and out of Dodge?
Well, I'll tell you...

It had something to do with the green, green grass that grows oh so clean in the northern climate...
It also had a little something to do with amazing sisters and the loving bond created while spending time together in oh so inebriated moments.
...could have had something to do with the fact that it was Gay Pride weekend in VT and we got to meet some of the sweetest guys in the state (and pay a hefty $10 cover to dance our butts off in the only gay bar in town because it was so the place to be!). "Respect."
...definitely had something to do with finding that perfect pair of blue jeans - even though I spent an inordinate amount of money on them.
...brunch at Penny Cluse (if you're ever in Burlington and don't brunch here then you're just stupid)! Best brunch on the planet!
...getting a first-hand look at the inner workings of a Presidential campaign (eye-opening).

...and last but certainly not least, lunch at the Cracker Barrel! Hey, I'm a good southern girl who never passes up an opportunity to eat at the Cracker Barrel. They are few and far between that far north of the Mason-Dixon!

I had such a wonderful weekend and felt so refreshed and recharged to be back! Until this morning that is, when I selflessly volunteered for a Make-a-Wish Foundation event that required me to be up and at 'em at 5:00 this morning. But being the trooper I am, I went and worked hard! Only to find out that the reason I feel so shitty might have something to do with the fact that I am suffering from Strep Throat. Great. I'm going home and going to bed. Just what the doctor ordered!

2003-06-15T22:42:00.000-04:00

Dear Daddy,
I was thinking about you today, being Father's Day and all. Do you realize it's been 10 years since the last time I heard your voice, held your hand, or saw your face (although I see it in my little brother's face more and more every day). 10 years sure does have a way of sneaking up on you. I have been trying all day now and for the life of me I can't remember what your voice sounded like or what your hands looked like. I would give anything to hear just one more "I love you pumpkin" or "time to get up" or "leave your brother alone." I do remember, though, the time you took me to the symphony, the time we planned my wedding when I was 7 years old, the Christmas that you sat up with me all night because I was so sick, the Saturday nights that you let me sneak downstairs past my bedtime to watch Dallas with you and eat popcorn, the winter nights when we used to sneak the dog into the basement because it was so cold outside, catching butterfliess with you in the park, playing chess and you letting me win, your artichoke salad (yuck), listening to you play the piano, and speaking German to the people at the McDonalds drive-through window. I also remember some of the terrible things I said to you. I am so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I was just mad and I was hurting and I didn't know what to do with all of those feelings. In fact, I'm still hurting and I don't think I'll ever know what to do with these feelings. So much has happened over the last ten years and every benchmark I pass I stop and imagine you there. I imagine a big smile on your face and a gleam in your eye that says, "that's my little girl." Sometimes I think I can feel you watching over me... and other times I know that there is no way I could have possibly gotten this far without you looking over me somehow. You always used to say to me, "remember who you are." I know who I am and I hope that I have grown into the woman that you always wished I would be. Every decision I make I consider whether I am being true to the person you raised me to be: honest, truthful, caring, selfless, and sincere. You were all these things and so much more. Where ever you are - Happy Father's Day Daddy. I miss you and I love you.
Forever & Always,
sis

2003-06-13T14:45:00.000-04:00

Friday the 13th - something had to go wrong...

This morning was the end-of-year show at the school where I work. I teach the colorguard (10 kids - all seventh graders). We had a two-hour rehearsal this morning at 8:00 before the show was to begin at 10:30. At 9:45 I was informed by the sound people that they had lost our music. There was no cd and the kids weren't going to get to perform unless we found it. Alas, the music never turned up. So, like a champ, I go speeding off to the nearest music store to buy a new cd. I wasn't about to disappoint these kids like that. They had worked so hard and for so long on this performance. When I got to the music store it was closed. I had to wait in the rain for 10 minutes until they opened. I ran down the isle grabbed the cd and ran back up to the counter. The music store guy looks at me and says, "you can't possibly have gotten up this early and waited until we opened just to buy a copy of Bon Jovi's Greatest Hits." Yeah, yeah. The things I do for these kids! I made it to the school just in time and they got to perform! I thought I couldn't wait til the end of the year and the kids cleared out of this place, but now I am really going to miss them. One of the girls even brought me flowers today! Nobody ever brings me flowers! She just made my whole weekend!

Today was also the day that yearbooks came out. Everybody is running around writing trite little love poems and 2-Kool-2-B-4-Gotten. I was in 16 pictures in my senior yearbook in High School. This year I made it to 2 pages: my ugly school photo that y'all will never see (is being burned in my trashcan as we speak) and the following (taken at the Soirée Sous Les Étoiles):

Super Assistant/colorguard instructor by day... Truman Capote heroine by night! Ladies and gentleman, Ms. Holly Golightly (and roommate)!

Am now off to Vermont... Toodles!!!

2003-06-12T09:38:00.000-04:00

I don't like being wrong. I really don't like being proven that I am wrong. All of that aside, it's one thing to be proven wrong by a living breathing human being, but by a cookie? An inanimate piece of food? I was completely prepared to make today's post all about fortune cookies and what a scam they are. I was going to tell you that if you ever felt compelled to make a decision because your fortune cookie told you to - don't. I was ready to warn you of the consequences of taking these things for more than entertainment value and actually believing that there might be a bit of truth in every fortune you get, but I can't. Patience is a virtue that I have yet to master. I just had to wait a little longer to find out that those little cookies really do speak the wisdom of the world after all and now I know the secret... "many a false step is made by standing still." I acted on this little piece of advice and for awhile I believed that had I not listened to this stupid little cookie things might have turned out better, but I was wrong. You might not reap the rewards immediately, but in the end the fortune cookie is always right. Sigh. Chinese anyone?

I am amazed at how you can live with someone for two whole years and come to find out in one night that you don't know them as well as you thought you had at all. I was in a bit of a funk last night and one of my wonderful roommates read me perfectly and took me away from the damed television and off for a night of wine and ciggies and crème brulée. We've become much closer over the past winter (due to long winter night talks over a bottle of wine and "the bachelorette") but last night we shared a lot of things that we had never discussed before. I was touched that she was opening up to me and I was amazed that after having lived together for two whole years there was still so much that we didn't know about each other. It has changed my outlook on all my friends and now I wonder how well they think they really know me...

The night ended with a ring, ring and the echo of "that really sexy voice" and I was off to sleep with a smile on my face. I don't know if it was that sexy voice that did it or the mixture of the wine and the crème brulée, but I had the weirdest dreams... The one that sticks out the most was the one where I received a visit from "the very hott guy". It was one of those dreams, though, where you are finally getting something that you have been waiting for forever, but something happens and you end up missing the whole thing somehow - for example: the hott guy that I have a total crush on shows up at my apartment, but I fall asleep right after he gets there and when I wake up he's leaving and I realize that I just missed my entire chance to be with him. You just keep thinking, "how could I possibly have fallen asleep?" It's a very disappointing feeling, but luckily I did wake up (in my dream) in time to get a goodbye kiss from "the hott guy". So I missed most of the visit, but at least I was around for the best part!

Travel plans have been set and this little flower is heading north to Vermont for the weekend! She's finally getting out of her garden! So let it rain! See if she cares! Mrs. Mother Nature, she will not let you ruin this weekend! She will run and jump in your stupid puddles and she will drink her margaritas on the patio in the rain if she has to! She is off to the big green mountain and nothing will get in her way!

Oh, and just a word to the wise - If you are a French guy and engaged and your girlfriend just happens to be out of town for the weekend and you are lonely and want someone to keep you company... Don't fucking call me! I'm not interested!

This just in...
Crush Kiss is coming to town! His band is playing NYC next weekend... round 2?

2003-06-10T12:02:00.000-04:00

Nervous Breakdown...
Things are really hectic right now. I think I've gotten in over my head between work, teaching the colorguard, and my volunteer work. I am having trouble finding time to breathe right now. I was up all night making the outfits for our show on Friday. My kids are going to be 80's punk rockers! How fun!

And now this...
Bonnaroo NE has been CANCELLED! Wha? I had a feeling after the Field Day show was moved to Giants Stadium, but cancelled??? Now I am sad. I was so looking forward to this weekend and hanging with all my buds and enjoying some really great music. *sniff* Maybe next year guys.

2003-06-09T13:27:00.000-04:00

I just accidently dropped my lunch in the garbage. It's one of those Mondays.

2003-06-09T12:01:00.000-04:00

Monday morning always seems to come so quickly. Perhaps because I slept the weekend away, but I needed it! I have fully recovered from Thursday nights festivities and swear that I will never do that again. Saturday I stayed in bed and read and watched old movies all day long. I got up about 7:00 p.m. and showered and met my uncle and his friends for dinner and drinks in the city. We happened to be seated at a table in between Helen Hunt and Al Paccino. I felt very A-list for the evening.

And this morning, another blah, blah, blah, cloudy day. I don't know how much more of this I can take! I am thinking of running away to Aruba or Jamaica... I am getting claustrophobic in my own skin. I think this weekend calls for a roadtrip - I hear the open road calling my name. North, south, east, or west - where might my travels take me???

2003-06-06T10:27:00.000-04:00

Friday morning, sitting at my desk, still drunk, smelling of booze, sporting a cool pair of sunglasses and a hell of a hangover. Do you think anyone will notice? How did I get myself into this mess you ask? I have but 2 words for you: Open Bar. Alcohol is the devil! I am swearing the stuff off for now into eternity. You heard it here first kids. I organized a little shindig last night for work (the fun part of my job) in this swanky little club on the westside and I am happy to report that it went over swimmingly. My uncle and his boyfriend happen to be in town for the weekend. So, after the party some friends and I met them over at a midtown cabaret where we drank some more and sang show tunes until 4:00 in the morning. I am a mess.

Good news is that I think 25 must be the magical cut-off number for cute and adorable adjectives. Since I hit the big 2-5 I haven't heard either term, normally reserved for puppies and babies, applied to me at all. I am finally moving on to the Adult adjectives! Stunning has come up twice now in the past week. Granted, once was from someone who has only seen a picture of me (and obviously not in my present condition because this is just downright scary) and the other was from a drunken gay man at the bar last night. They both count damn-it! I can't tell you how flattering it is to have a man tell you, "I think this is the first time I've ever wished I was straight." Yeah baby!

Well, I think I am going to go stick my head in a toilet for awhile. How's that for stunning?

2003-06-05T07:26:00.000-04:00

It’s late and raining and I am lying in my comfy cozy bed admiring my new raspberry truffle walls. It is such a sexy color. I am loving it! The rain just won’t quit coming. The thunder is loud and the lightening flashes are throwing spooky shadows on the wall. It’s one of those nights.

I was inspired by Sassy's Un-Filthy Friday Five last week. It got me thinking about my own first kisses and how exciting first kisses can be - how much fun it is to kiss someone all night long - how sexy it is when lips bump and tangle and twist clumsily and passionately, even urgently at times. So I thought I would share my top 5 all-time-best kisses!

1.) The Real First Kiss. It was the last day of school of second grade. We were having an end-of-year skating party at the local skating rink. The year was 1986. The dj was playing Whitney Houston’s “Let’s hear it for the boy.” My family was moving that summer to Nashville, TN and I was sad about having to leave all of my friends behind, especially my long-term boyfriend. We had been seeing each other exclusively since kindergarten. I had never loved another and now I was going to have to leave him forever (how dramatic). All of the girls told me they heard he was going to ask me to couples skate and I could feel the butterflies in my stomach. He did ask me and we skated around the rink to a cheesy 80’s love song and held hands and everything was right in the world. When the song was over I didn’t have time to blink before an older girl came up behind me and held me still so he could kiss me. (how ironic. me not wanting a boy to kiss me.) Anyway, she held me down and he kissed me and that was the beginning and the end. I was mortified, but deep down was gloating to be the only girl in second grade to get a smooch! Awww, how romantic.

2.) The First Girl Kiss. I was a senior in high school and my best friend and I were at her boyfriend’s house one night hanging out and smoking doobies. He decided that it would be really cool if we kissed (as all high school boys decide), but that we would never do it because we didn’t have the guts. We looked at each other and you could tell that we were both trying to decide what the other was thinking. Before either of us knew what was happening her lips grazed mine and I felt her wet tongue slide across my lips. Our tongues met and mingled and tasted what it was like to be with another girl for the first time.

3.) The Crush Kiss. My freshman year in college I had a tremendous crush on a senior. I crushed on him all year long and followed him around like a little puppy dog. We were both studying music and spent long hours in the practice rooms even on Friday nights. I remember I used to happen by his door and he would kindly offer to help me with a piece I was working on or we’d just sit and shoot the shit for a while. He played with a few different bands and I would go to his shows and pine away for him from the audience. One night during finals I wanted to go to a show, but I couldn’t find anyone who could go with me. So I went by myself and afterwards he invited me to go to a party with him. We got tired of the party and wanted to go somewhere else so we got in his car and started driving. We drove all over town and ended up back at his place to just hang out and watch a movie. During the movie we started play fighting over something stupid, which turned into play wrestling, which turned into him on top of me pinning me to the couch with both arms around me and declaring himself the winner.
Daisy: Yeah! I won!
Crush: How do you figure that? It looks like I am the one who has pinned you down.
Daisy: Yep, I got you right where I want you.
*smooooch*

4.) Best Foreign Kiss. I met my little Italian boyfriend in the streets of Venice during Carnivale in 2000. We made eye contact and flirted across the crowd. We played hide and seek for a while around all of the people and costumes and masks. I felt like Romeo and Juliet at the masquerade ball. He finally caught me and introduced himself… I guess. He was speaking Italian and I didn’t understand a word. Italiano? No capisco. Americano? Si. Si. No parlo englese. WHA? Luckily he knew the international symbol for beer and we headed to a sidewalk café where we laughed and tried to talk to each other and looked into each others’ eyes. We went for a walk through the streets of Venice and stopped and sat on the side of a canal and watched the gondolas pass by. He turned to me and said something that was probably the most romantic thing I have ever heard. I have no idea what exactly he said, but the beautiful sound of the Italian language made me need to kiss him. So we kissed into the sunset and listened to the water lap against the old crumbling buildings. Night fell and we said goodbye never to see each other again.

5.) Last but certainly not least… the Oscar for best kiss goes to (drum roll please):
I developed another one of my infamous crushes on this hott lead singer of a really good band that I have listened to for years. I would go to their shows with friends and always comment on how sexy I thought he was. I finally got up the nerve to speak to him after one of his recent shows and we started talking and flirting and calling each other. One weekend he came up to New York City for a few days and we made plans to meet and share some wine and conversation. I was so nervous around him I couldn’t think of anything charming or witty to say. But he was so sweet and pretended that he didn’t notice. We decided to go for a walk down to the beach and look at the stars and try to feel the earth rotating on its axis and the enjoy the sensation of being a part of something “a little bit bigger than ourselves.” His eyes twinkled in the moonlight and slowly our hands found each other. His fingertips kissed my palms and traced the little scar on my finger. He ran his fingers through my hair and gently caressed my cheek. I’ve never wanted to kiss anyone so badly and when his lips met mine the tension exploded across the night sky. His lips lingered for what seemed like hours and when I close my eyes tonight I can still feel their warmth and softness and taste their sweetness.

Ok, so #5 never really happened, but that’s what makes it the best. It’s the kiss that might never become reality, but is so much fun to dream about. Because we all know, the best part of the kiss isn’t when your lips meet for the first time… it’s the anticipation.

2003-06-04T14:15:00.000-04:00

I think the fumes have gone to my head.
Rainy Days in Numbers:
1 bedroom painted out of sheer boredom (raspberry truffle. pretty.)
4 hours spent painting room and breathing fumes.
6,000 cigarettes smoked out of sheer boredom.
12 hours of reality tv watched out of sheer boredom.
1/2 number of disgusting organic pot pies eaten out of sheer boredom.
0 number of boys kissed down by the broken treehouse.
4 loads of laundry done out of sheer boredom.
2 pieces of furniture moved out of sheer boredom.
0 number of times I offered to walk the dogs. Come on, it's raining!
10 fingernails I've biten off in sheer boredom.
4 movies rented and watched out of sheer boredom.
SOMEBODY MAKE IT STOP!

2003-06-04T13:16:00.000-04:00

Check it out kids...
The archives are back... this is just for you Bitchen!
Happy reading...

2003-06-03T12:53:00.000-04:00

Sigh of Relief
I sat down and had a heart-to-heart with my roommates last night (the ones that bought the house and are leaving) and explained to them my situation. There are a lot of underlying factors to this story, but the end result is that they have asked me to move into their new house with them until I leave for school in the fall. That is a BIG load off my shoulders. No more homeless Daisy! Yeah! The thought of having to pack up and move everything still gives me headache, but at least now I have somewhere to move it all to. Now that I've got that all worked out, though, my car is falling apart. If it's not one thing it's another!

What is wrong with me that I am so damn addicted to these STUPID dating reality tv shows! This new one, For Love or Money, it's terrible! Two hours and half a pack of cigarettes later I am hating myself for having wasted these precious moments of my life on such BAD television! And what is with the guy they have chosen? CREEPY! I think he has spent way too much time with the crazy serial killers he's supposed to be defending. Will I be watching next Monday night? You know I will.

Is there a rule that says you have to keep archives? Should I reinstate the archives? Does anyone really read them anyway?

2003-06-02T10:56:00.000-04:00

Weekend Update:
This was a nice quiet rainy blockbuster weekend until Sunday... It started off early - I had one of those weird dreams Saturday night where you are crying in your dream and when you wake up you realize that you have really been crying and you have a terrible headache from crying in your sleep. Then Sunday afternoon I found out that this little flower might soon be homeless. Two of my roommates, recently married, have bought a house and are planning on moving out in a few months. Since the lease is in her name that means that this little flower must go too. My other roomate and I are contemplating what to do now. We either move out now and leave them stranded or they move out in a few months and leave us stranded. Either way somebody gets screwed in the deal. It sucks and just thinking about it makes me sick. So, if anybody out there knows of a garden looking for a pretty flower to call it home...

I met the nicest lady outside of starbucks today. She was wearing a headband with sparkly antenna and introduced me to her daughter - an alien doll on a stick. Sometimes life just makes me want to cry.

However, on a lighter note, I met the most amazing guy on Sunday afternoon at the laudrymat... he was gorgeous, he does laundry and he couldn't speak a lick of English. Maybe he asked me to dinner, maybe he asked me to make sweet love to him... I settled for a wink and a smile.

2003-05-30T09:07:00.000-04:00

Lurking in the shadows of my insecurity...
You saw the light in my bedroom window and you sat and watched from the field across the way. You tried not to come back but you couldn't stay away - day after day. You would wait patiently at the bus stop for me to return. You followed me across the street and down the path that ran by the tracks and through the woods to my appartment. You never said a word, but I knew you were there. I could hear you breathing. I could see your shadows. You would stop at the end of the path and you would watch. No telling how long you watched.

Then one night you broke your silence. You waited for me in the gathering darkness, hidden by the shadows of night. Your quiet footsteps fell in behind mine, slowly at first then faster and faster until I could feel your breath on the back of my neck. I turned and for the first time I looked you right in the eye. You were a man - obsessed. consumed. determined. This time you wouldn't let me go. You grabbed my arm and the clinking of your metal belt still echos in my mind. "Be quiet. Be quiet and I won't hurt you." My heart was beating out of my chest and with every ounce of my being I screamed, I struggled, I fought back and I ran. I ran. I ran.

You chased me into the night. My sandals fell off and I felt the gravel from the road biting into the soles of my feet and still I ran. I ran towards the light and you disappeared behind a tree. I stopped on the other side of the road and saw you there. watching. again.

I reached the platform where a few people were waiting for their train. No one had heard me scream. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy. But one man was there to pick me up and hold my shaking hand. His soft voice comforted me and his warm touch wiped away a tear. He promised to protect me. He promised he would find you.

I hate you for making me afraid and I hate you for making me angry. I hate you for making me constantly look over my shoulder. I hate you for taking my beautiful memories of that wonderful place and twisting them into that look upon your face. You took my sense of security, but I would never let you have what you were really after. You are the coward.

2003-05-28T09:28:00.000-04:00

This was a very insightful morning for me. Between the time I woke up and the time I got to work I realized several important things:
I have the best friends in the whole world (see the new photo posted from the b-day party).
Jack Daniels is not one of them.
I love people who give me bottles of wine.
I have to take the GRE this summer... why they make you take the gre AND the lsat I'll never know - probably just to torture me.
I don't think I could handle it if I found out that Williamsburg Hipster really dumped me for a man (not that he did, but wouldn't that suck?). No offense Joe. Actually, If I were a man I would probably dump me for Joe. I found out last night that this just happened to a friend of mine - married 8 years. wow. (no, her husband didn't leave her for Joe - you know what I mean)
I am ALWAYS late to work. always. this morning was no exception.
I am scared. I don't know what I am scared of or why, but I have that feeling in the pit of my stomach that tells me something is wrong. Or maybe that's just Jack Daniels talking to me.
My birthday party just wasn't complete without bryan, joe, sassy, joker, indigo, chesa and julia. (next year guys)
I can drive, drink coffee, smoke a cigarette, and shift all at the same time.
A late night phone conversation with a hott guy with a really sexy voice rocks! :)
I have an extremely overdue book to return to the Library.
Magnets make great birthday presents.
There's a hole in the bucket, dear Liza, a hole.

2003-05-27T18:06:00.000-04:00

Happy Birthday to me! I am officialy a quarter-of-a-century old today! Wow, that sounds pretty old when I put it that way. I am going out to celebrate with some close friends: Japanese steakhouse for dinner and house party to finish the night off right! yeah! Here's to getting older!

I had a fabulous time in Illinois over the weekend. Everyone in my family either had or is having babies right now. If I hear one more baby/pregnancy story I think I am going to hurl! So my cousin and I kept sneaking off to the garage for a smoke just to escape the talk. We kidnapped my brother-in-law on Saturday night and headed to the local tavern. By local tavern I mean, shack in the middle of a corn field with cheap beer, cheap tequila, and really scary country folk. We didn't exactly look like we belonged. We walked in and the music stopped and everyone turned to look at us. It was a bit uncomfortable. We couldn't stay long because my cousin and I couldn't stop laughing and my brother-in-law was afraid that we were going to get his ass kicked. We got back to Grandma's house and my back was killing me. So, Grandma pumped me full of valium and sent me to bed. Did I mention that I LOVE my grandma??? All-in-all it was a good weekend. But after spending all that time with the married folk and baby people I have to say that I LOVE my life! I wouldn't trade it for the world right now! I am going out tonight (without having to get a babysitter and without having to ask permission), I am drinking myself into oblivion (without feeling guilty and without having to pump first), and I might even make out with a complete stranger (but only if I'm lucky).

Cheers to you and yours!

2003-05-23T12:09:00.000-04:00

I am headed off to the Land of Lincoln for this wonderful Holiday weekend. It should be pretty dry there - as opposed to NY, which will be drenched all weekend long.

I know that I said end-of-story with rocker boy, but it seems as if this Williamsburg hipster just won't go away. Since Monday he has called (with absolutely nothing to say mind you) and emailed me (again with not much to say). He apparently doesn't want to date, but he doesn't want me to forget about him either. Is this the way it goes? I would much prefer that he just forgot about me all together because I'd rather not get dragged along for the ride.

I believe I have narrowed my law school choices down to 5 finalists... Duke, UVA, George Washington U., Vanderbilt, and Columbia. Now let's just all keep our fingers crossed and hope that one of them would like to have my beautiful brain on their side! If not, then I am joining the Peace Corps. There are plenty of places in Africa for French speakers like myself. It's something I've thought about for a very long time and I know that if Law School isn't in the cards then this is something that I really want to do.

In other news... Tuesday is my birthday so there will be much celebrating/drinking to be done! Woo-hoo!

I hope you all have a fun and safe holiday weekend and I expect to hear all about it when I get back!

2003-05-22T09:15:00.000-04:00

Dedicated Post: Time, why you punish me?

Dear Gemini:
"Discipline and a sense of duty have been major themes for you lately, and it may seem as if someone has put the brakes on a current plan of yours, dear Gemini. Try not to see this as a negative thing. In reality, this is an important time for you to slow down and plan. Be aware of the passage of time."

I was just noticing this morning how all of the trees are bright green and full of leaves and life. The flowers are blooming. The world seems to have shaken off the brutal hold of winter and exploded into spring. When did this happen? Just yesterday I was musing at the fact that the trees were all still bare. Blink and you miss it. Time has moved so fast for me ever since I moved to NY. I have wondered if I entered a new dimension when I crossed the Hudson river for the first time. The passage of time in the North is so different from the passage of time in the south. In the south, people take time to enjoy life - have a glass of sweet tea and just watch the time pass. Here, time is money. Busy, busy, busy. No time to talk - catch you later! I am falling into this trap myself and am glad that the astrological chart is there to remind me to slow down and take a moment to stop and smell the flowers.

"We're living in the passage of time.
We live in each other's distance."

In retrospect by Maya Angelou
Last year changed its seasons
subtly, stripped its sultry winds
for the reds of dying leaves,
let gelid drips of winter ice
melt onto a warming earth
and urged the dormant bulbs
to brave the pain of spring.

We, loving, above the whim of
time, did not notice.

Alone. I remember now

2003-05-21T11:10:00.000-04:00

I am feeling very claustrophobic right now - small green office with no windows to the outside world. Voices coming from the hallway, but I can't see their faces. Air, there's no air in here! I need to get out of my office soon. No one is here so I am thinking about cutting out for a smoke. Usually this would be ok, but I work at a school (middle school kids) where this is generally frowned upon. Am going anyway. I can't sit in this office another minute... argh.

2003-05-19T16:04:00.000-04:00

Rock Gods and Generals Pt.III
Daisy: (making coffee in background)
Rock God: Are you taking a bath?
Daisy: Yeah, I thought while I had you on the phone I would take this opportunity to take off all my clothes and slip into a hot bath... no, silly. I am making coffee.
Rock God: Oh, that's too bad.
Daisy: *blushes and grins*

2003-05-19T13:55:00.000-04:00

The best part of waking up
I have come to realize that of all the coffee I drink, the first cup on Saturday morning always tastes the best. Sitting on the front steps with a cup of coffee in one hand, a ciggy in the other, sunshine on my face, and the sounds of Mexico, Cuba and Brazil blaring from the neighbors’ houses. You see - my neighborhood, once home to wandering tribes of Mohegan Indians, is now ‘El Barrio’, a haven for the Latino masses of Westchester County. From my front porch it seems as if there is some sort of block party going on and I wonder what the celebration is all about. There is a little girl dancing on the sidewalk to the music coming from the first floor window. She sees me watching her and smiles shyly as she is pulled from her summer reverie. Today, however, is no holiday. This is a celebration of spring. When I first moved here I was annoyed at being woken up early on lazy weekend mornings by the sounds of the neighborhood. But now I have come to regard it as the soft, subtle assurance of spring. This street is transformed by the warmth and sunshine into a whole other country. It comes alive with the sounds of native lands and children’s laughter. I have grown quite fond of the music especially and I know that when I eventually leave this place what I’ll miss the most will be the Latin soundtrack that accompanies my morning coffee and smoke.

In other news...
When men and women are friends, especially close friends, there inevitably comes that awkward moment - the awkward silence - the a little too close for comfort moment - yes, even with very platonic friends. I think they call it sexual tension. I hate this moment, yet it inevitably occurs and did occur to me this weekend. Luckily nothing happend and the moment passed... for now.

RB never called. Bastard. End of story.

However, my favorite rock god did! It's such a shame that he lives so far away. Oh well, fun flirting for now!

2003-05-16T08:39:00.000-04:00

Rock Gods and Generals - Pt.II
Daisy (before the show): I can't wait to see you guys this weekend. I'm going to pick up the new cd and have a torrid summer love affair with it.
Rock God: Good, cause torrid summer love affairs are a band specialty.
Daisy (in email after the show): Great show. However, I am a bit disappointed that torrid summer love affairs are a band specialty and not your specialty, cause I could sure go for some of that right now.
**Rock God: summer love affairs ARE my specialty.

**definitely flirting, esp. when followed by home phone number.

2003-05-15T21:02:00.000-04:00

Rock Gods & Generals
First, rb sent me an email apologizing for not having called last night. Apparently, he's sick or something. It was weird though, cause at the end of the email he said, "I hope you're not too mad at me." Now I'm wondering why he would have said that. Either he's one of the few men who actually have a clue about women (esp. neurotic women like myself) and realizes how I interpreted his not calling or he really was blowing me off, but thought better of it and decided not too. Or... *gasp* he reads my blog and now knows everything! That would suck. What? I am over-analyzing this? Me? Anyway, he still hasn't called tonight. Emails don't count. You gotta make that call - I don't care what century we're living in.

But there is something else brewing in the air... I just got an email from my favorite "Rock God" (NOT rb) and I think he was flirting with me. No, I'm sure he was flirting with me. wow.

*Daisy floating above the clouds w/stupid grin on her face*

2003-05-15T16:31:00.000-04:00

Dinner and Dawson's Creek
I went to the grocery store after work last night, bought a lot of groceries to make a nice dinner, cooked my special quesadillas (roasted red pepper, roasted corn, sautéed mushrooms, onions, goat cheese and guacamole - yummy!), and then when I left the room for 10 seconds and walked down the hall to answer my phone (not rb, btw) the dog jumped up on the counter and ate my dinner! What are you going to do, though? He's a 150 pound Bull Mastif - it's not like I was going to fight him for it. So, I was just in a pissy mood for the rest of the evening. Oh well, I didn't get my dinner, but at least Pacey got the girl!

BIG NEWS just came across the wire... update soon!

2003-05-14T22:39:00.000-04:00

Ummm, right.
rb: hey there.
daisy: hey
rb: ooops, I gotta run.
daisy: k, bye.
rb: really sorry. I'll call you tonight. latta.

daisy's phone: ... ... ... ... ... ... ...

Figures.

2003-05-14T08:52:00.000-04:00

The morning after
Ok, I am feeling much less neurotic today. Que sera sera, huh?
You can all come out of your hiding places.

Perspective gained thanks to couscous dinner with JL and his mom and a nice bottle of African wine. Good wine always seems to put things in perspective.

And not only did our tech guy come through with the new flat screen monitor, but yours truly just got a whole brand spankin' new computer! (emphasis on the spankin'!) It's amazing what one can accomplish with just a few bats of the eyelashes - and an irresistible smile, I might add.

2003-05-13T09:35:00.000-04:00

Just to clarify...
I spent last night trying to keep myself away from the phone (ie: watching Mr. Personality). I wanted to call rocker boy just to hear his voice (not only is he an amazing kisser, but he also has a very sexy voice), but I know I'm not supposed to call. Apparently, according to some unwritten dating law, it has something to do with seeming over eager, desperate, too interested, etc. Why does one silly phone call have to mean all of this? Why can't I just call and say hello without it implying all of these other things? I've never been very good at dating. I tend not to let people get very close to me, not to communicate very well, and not give a shit about all these unwritten dating laws. I guess I also have some abandonment issues, however, I always seem to be the one running away. Usually after the second date I freak out, start avoiding phone calls, and generally fall off the face of the earth. This leads a lot of people to think that I am a cold-hearted bitch, which I assure you is not the case. I am really a very sweet girl - with absolutely no concept of how to have a healthy relationship. This is the first time that I've actually found myself wanting to call him and wanting to see him and not pressing ignore everytime my cell phone rings. And this scares me... What scares me even more is turning into one of those neurotic women who even gives a shit! Somebody slap me, quick! And all of this for a Williamsburg hipster - aaagh!

2003-05-12T12:56:00.000-04:00

Weekend Update...
I had several firsts and an awesome second this weekend!
As for the firsts:
I saw this band at le Bar Bat and got a copy of MT's new solo album. He's such a rock star!
I babysat Saturday night and I guess the father didn't realize that I was already at their house and he came waltzing into the kitchen butt naked! That was a little awkward!
I got a phone call from my sister telling me that I am going to be an aunt! The first baby in our family should be here in January and it's all everyone can talk about!
And finally, I hung out in Brooklyn! I had been to Brooklyn once before to eat, but this time I hung out with rocker boy and he gave me a tour of his neighborhood, Williamsburg.
Which leads me to the awesome second:
I got to kiss rocker boy again. And again... WOW! I could definitely get used to kissing him on a regular basis. I love the way he touches my face when he kisses me. And he is quite a gentleman. Sigh.

So, in case you missed it Saturday was LUST and Sunday was GLUTTONY... don't worry if you did miss it though. I think I lusted and gluttoned (?) enough for us all this weekend! Now I'm starting over again with sloth...

Right now I am home in bed nursing a sore throat and ear ache. I feel like crap. I'm going for some OJ and a nap. zzzzzzzz

2003-05-09T12:34:00.000-04:00

Seven Sins - Seven Days
Day Five: STUPIDITY
Studpidity is...
meaning to write all day and not making this post until now.
not informing everyone earlier that the Empty's are playing Le Bar Bat in NYC tonight!
having to look up the English word for prevenir in the dictionary (to inform).
not stopping to get cigs on the way home from work.
thinking that anyone will be home reading this on a Friday night!
Wait... I was supposed to be combatting stupidity today! How stupid of me!

2003-05-09T09:23:00.000-04:00

Pour ma mère...
J'entendais dans sa voix la mer qui frappé sur les rochers. J'entendais aussi les oiseaux au matin aurore, les goélands. J'entendais les ruisseaux qui coulent dans la forêt. J'entendais le vent sauvage à travers les arbres. Et vous l'entendriez aussi...

2003-05-08T12:23:00.000-04:00

Seven Sins - Seven Days
Day Four: SLOTH
I wish I could have spent the day at home in bed and done this properly, but unfortunately someone has to pay the rent around this place! So here I am at work thinking of ways to be slothful... I am definitely not going to the gym tonight (because that happens often). I'm not even walking the dog tonight. I can't be bothered to walk up the stairs to make copies. I can't be bothered to go down the street to get lunch (have sent a co-worker/roommate to do my dirty work). In fact I can't even be bothered to finish this post... am going to take a nap under my desk instead.

2003-05-07T22:01:00.000-04:00

Date Night
I met rocker boy last night for dinner and drinks at Bar 9. It was a very typical first date: cocktails, small talk, nervous laughter, uncomfortable silences, hair flipping, flirting, anticipation, and the first kiss.

The first kiss is so important because it can make or break a guy. A girl can have a really good date with a guy who turns out to be a very bad kisser and it's all over. She'll never look at him the same way again. On the other hand, a girl can have a bad date with an amazing kisser and all of a sudden he has somehow redeemed himself.

I drove rocker boy down to 14th street around midnight so he could catch the subway back over to Brooklyn. We politely thanked each other for a fun evening and promised to do it again soon. He hesitated and leaned in for a kiss...

I saw stars. This guy is probably the best kisser I have EVER kissed, and I've kissed more than a few boys (and maybe even a girl or two). I'm not even sure what makes a guy a good kisser or not. All I know is that when he kissed me I felt... speechless. The best kiss is the lingering one - the one you still feel on your lips days later. hmmmmm... kissing is good.

2003-05-07T16:46:00.000-04:00

Seven Sins - Seven Days
Day Three: PRIDE
Now today's was a very easy task. Everybody out there has at least one thing they can be proud of. I am proud of the fact that I have several things to be proud of.
I am damn proud of the fact that I was on time to work today... that usually never happens - especially after a long night out where consumption of mass amounts of alcohol was involved.
I am proud to be a Dave Matthews Fan-atic.
I am proud of my decision to go to law school. (I will be even prouder of the law school admissions officer who agrees to accept me!)
I am proud of my new promotion to Associate Director of Alumni Affairs... "Office of Alumni Affairs, would you like to have one?"
I am proud of my 7th graders who are learning to toss a flag around quite well.
I am proud to be an American... where at least I know I'm free!
I am proud of myself for remembering that it's Mother's Day this weekend and ordering flowers on time for a change.

2003-05-07T16:37:00.000-04:00

Bonnaroo NE
I just bought tickets to Bonnaroo NE!!!! Anybody else heading up for the show??? It should definitely prove to be a good time - Dave will be there!

2003-05-06T08:49:00.000-04:00

The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Seventh Level of Hell!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Low
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	High
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	High
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Moderate
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	Moderate
Level 7 (Violent)	Very High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	High
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Low

Take the Dante's Divine Comedy Inferno Test

2003-05-06T08:35:00.000-04:00

Seven Sins - Seven Days
Day Two: ANGER
Wow, it's harder than I expected to be angry all day long. I just don't see how so many people do it all the time. I shook my fist at people in traffic, I yelled at a group of Junior High kids, I broke pencils on my desk, I seethed at the tech guy who took my computer out of order for hours today (although I couldn't be really mad because he is getting me that flat screen monitor), I sent angry emails to my friends, and still it was only a half-hearted attempt at anger. There was always a grin lurking just beyond the shadows. So there you have it folks. I am violent, but not angry. Envy got me a new flat screen monitor, all Angry got me was a headache and a bunch of strange looks. I'm ready for day 3!

P.S. - I have a date tonight! :) I have absolutely no illusions of grandeur here. I haven't been on a good date since 1917, but it'll be nice not to have to pay for a change. I've warned him that I will be very angry all night long and he said he could deal. He's a rocker - so maybe the whole anger thing will score me a few extra points! Hey, I just might get a little somethin' somethin' out of anger day yet! ;) Wish me luck...

2003-05-05T17:09:00.000-04:00

Seven Sins - Seven Days
Day One: ENVY
As per directed, I spent the day coveting my co-worker's beautiful flat screen monitor. In fact, I came to realize that I am almost the only person left without one. huh? Exactly. So, I bugged and pestered and pleaded... and I finally just asked the tech guy if I could have one and he said, "sure, no problem. I can get you a flat screen."
That's it? All I had to do was ask???

2003-05-04T19:17:00.000-04:00

Isn't she lovely?
Apparently, I am cute and adorable. Or so I've been told. I am approaching my 25th birthday and somehow the same words that apply to puppies and babies still apply to me. Every guy I meet seems to have the same comment: "Aw, you're so cute." "Well, aren't you adorable?" This is not what a woman wants to hear. Why is it that the only adjectives that apply to me are cute and adorable???

Aren't you just the least bit curious?

2003-05-04T00:15:00.000-04:00

This is New York, typically New York... as seen through my eyes anyway
1.) X-Men 2
2.) at the Ziegfield Follies Theater
3.) Wheechairs chained to the bike rack (although it would truly be New York had the wheels been stolen off the wheelchair)
4.) Grown men running around in yellow spandex Wolverine costumes
5.) The Irish Pub
6.) New York Cares- Spring Clean-Up day
7.) Street fairs
8.) staring contests with 4-year-olds on the 2:00 a.m. L train (I won!)
9.) Killer metro doors that will smash you on a moments notice
10.) Johnny Seven
11.) Brooklyn Brewery (Thanks for all the free beer!)
12.) Brunch at 7A

All in a day's work!

2003-05-02T16:16:00.000-04:00

WHY ARE ALL THE HOT BOYS TAKEN???

WHY GOD? WHY?

2003-05-01T13:09:00.000-04:00

Moral Conundrum
Last Thursday my friend "Scary Spice", who happens to be addicted to craigslist, read an ad from a comedian in NYC.
"I am bored at work. Can I make you laugh?"
She too happened to be pretty bored at work - so she emailed the guy, got his number, and called him. He told her a really funny joke, she laughed and then went back to work/perusing craigslist.

Fast-forward to later that night. The girls and I are heading into the city for a long night of drunken debauchery and "Scary Spice" thinks it would be a good idea to call this guy and have him meet us to do a few magic tricks. She calls the guy and he agrees to meet us at Bean. He was indeed a very funny guy. He amused us with card tricks for almost half an hour and told a few jokes. I can't imagine being around him often though, even when he tried to have just a normal conversation he still talked in one-liners. A bit annoying after awhile.

Well, apparently this guy thought that he was invited to "hang" with the girls all night and was bit taken aback when we thanked him for the laugh and left. Scary said he emailed her the next day and was a bit angry that we had ditched him. He spent a few hours that night wandering around NYC trying to find the bar that she had mentioned we might be going to. Sad really.

Yeah, Scary has a thing about meeting people from the internet. She's not an internet dater, but she loves to meet people. So she'll agree to meet just about anyone. Only once she said that she totally walked out on a guy. He had described himself as 27 years old and just an average guy. When he showed up he was a 400 pound, short, bald, middle-aged man. He walks up to her and says, "You must me Scary Spice, let me buy you a drink." Her response? "Hi, yeah, I'm sorry but I've just got to go. Bye now." Yeah. She got a pretty pissed off email after that one. What are you going to do?

So I guess my question is this... was it cruel of us not to invite this comedian out or were we well within craigslist etiquette by thanking him and going about our business? Also, have any of you ever actually met any cool people from out there in the online world? (dumb question, we're bloggers - we're all cool right?) Allow me to rephrase, have you met any non-bloggers online that have turned out to be pretty cool, ie: people you would choose for friends had you met them somewhere else?

I've gone along with friends several times who were meeting online people and they just never seemed to match up to what we were expecting. Very nice people, just not necessarily people that you would hang out with often.

Internet meetup horror stories? Success stories? Anyone? Anyone?

2003-04-29T15:56:00.000-04:00

Clerihew for Mark
Pretty little Daisy
Once had a crush on Patrick Swayze
Now she fills her time
Trying to find a rhyme

To impress Londonmark
Whose blog she found on a lark
In hope that she might elicit
His affections most implicit

2003-04-29T12:16:00.000-04:00

On being a woman...
Yes, there is a long list of things that women endure that men will just never understand. No, I will not outline them all for you right here. I am sure that you have a fairly good idea of what most of these things are already from your mothers/sisters/girlfriends/wives etc. We tend to be very vocal in expressing our sentiment of injustice about these things from time to time - especially when we are actually physically enduring them. I would, however, like to discuss one particular injustice: the gynecologist. (Now boys, stick around, this is where it gets interesting) Haven't you ever wondered what type of person wakes up one morning and thinks, "I want to become a gynecologist!" Well, this weekend I found out.

Bond Street
I stepped outside the trendy and overly pretentious Bond Street Lounge on Saturday night to enjoy a cigarette and curse Mayor Michael Bloomberg in the process. As I was standing there, A gentleman from inside the bar came out and pointedly made is way to my side as he whipped out his cell phone to make a call. "Yes this is Dr. Lambert*. May I speak to an intern on the 4th floor please?" Jokingly I turned to guy while he was on hold and said, "I know you really called your answering machine, it's ok. You don't have to impress me." We had a laugh and struck up a conversation. So I ask this stranger, "What kind of doctor are you?" He laughs and says,"I'm a gynecologist." This is the first time I've ever been hit on by a gynecologist and so it gets me thinking... would I be able to date a gynecologist? Wouldn't I be self-conscious? Doesn't he get sick of looking at women's vaginas all day long? Boys, if you're thinking of becoming a gynecologist, there is an easier way to get to look at a lot of naked women. It's called porn. Anyway, Dr Lambert assured me that it doesn't affect his personal life whatsoever. He also asked if I was looking to switch gynecologists and offered to give me his card. Ewww! "So where did you find your gynecologist? Oh, he picked me up in a bar." That's just weird.

17 will get you 20
Dr. Lambert then proceeds to tell me of this time that he was in another bar and his friend wanted to pick up on a hot young 17-year-old girl. So he was charged with talking to her friend in order to give his friend some face time with the hottie. About 15 minutes into the conversation the girl calls out to her friend, "Hey, doesn't this guy look just like my gynecologist?" His response? "Sorry, I didn't recognize your face." This is the guy who said, "I just like delivering babies." Right.

2003-04-28T11:48:00.000-04:00

Another damn Spanish chain letter! What's up with you people?

Why is it that P meets all these cool people in NYC and I meet this guy...
"What are ya gonna do? The kid's gonna have a dead monkey and that's sad. So, you know what I did? I called the monkey to me and he climbed right up on my chest, yo. Then he shit on me, all over my chest. So, I slapped that monkey. I don't usually hit monkeys, but I slapped that monkey and I told him, yo, I don't play."

I'd like to thank the nice people at the Flea Market Cafe for their hospitality Sunday night, ie: free booze! We love you Tunisia!

Can any New Yorker out there fill me in on the "Cartoon Network"??? Sounds a little sketchy if you ask me.

100 Things
2.) Le Souk - Great Moroccan Restaurant/Lounge with impolite meatheads at the door. Order the party pitcher of Sangria and you won't be disappointed. (Lower East Side)
3.) Flea Market Cafe - Great French Bistro where they give you lots of free stuff if you speak French. (Lower East Side)
4.) Sunday afternoon at Fort Tryon Park... venture up Broadway towards the Cloisters almost till you hit the border patrol and you'll find a beautiful oasis on the Hudson River.

2003-04-25T15:54:00.000-04:00

I was looking out the window to check on my car this morning and I saw a white piece of paper under the windshield wiper. Damn! Another ticket for parking too close to the fire hydrant. So, I went downstairs to move the car and realized that it wasn't a ticket at all. It was an envelope with a letter inside. I open the letter, a bit intrigued (admirer or stalker?), to find that it was written in Spanish. I don't speak Spanish! I had no idea what it said. So I took it to my roommate who speaks a little bit and she told me that it was a chain letter. I threw it away... what? It doesn't count if it's in another language! That's MY rule and I won't feel guilty!

Does anyone else feel bad biting the heads off the animal crackers? It's so sad, but they're so damn good!

I had shrimp for dinner last night! You're thinking, "yeah, what's so amazing about that?" It was the first time I've ever had shrimp for dinner or lunch or even breakfast for that matter. I don't eat seafood. So I've recently decided that this summer I am going to expand my horizons. Mission: do 100 things that I've never done before (I'm open to suggestions). This includes going new places, trying new things, etc. As long as it's never been done before.
1.) Cook shrimp for dinner. I even enjoyed it! However, still a little creepy.

2003-04-24T23:18:00.000-04:00

As Agirlnamedbob reminds me, New York isn't the only place where you meet crazy people trying to let an apartment.

Attending university in southern appalachia in East Tennessee you meet a lot of very interesting (loose interpretation of the term interesting) people. One year a few girlfriends and I were looking for a new place to live. We answered an add in the paper for a house for rent and made arrangements to see the place and meet the owner. When we arrived we were surprised to find floor-to-floor red shag carpet and wall-to-wall fake wood paneling. Nice. The locks on two bedroom doors were turned backwards to lock from the outside. Disturbing. The man showing us the house said he had problems with the last tenants and had to evict them because he "found one of them dope smoking pipes on the back porch and (he) ain't gonna have no dope smokers livin' in (his) house." Who am I to argue with a man whose license plate reads "HANGMAN" and has a gun rack in the back of his truck??? Scary. Being stoned as we were, we did the only thing we could do - thanked him for showing us the place, told him we'd get back to him soon, got in the car and rolled another spliff in his honor. Oh, the man's big selling point on the house: the neighbors were both police officers with police dogs. Right.
Needless to say, we never went back.

2003-04-23T16:24:00.000-04:00

Yeah, lovely boss just gave yours truly a VERY nice bottle of champagne to recognize all the hard work the little flower has done all year long! Now, I'm thinking champagne, strawberries, bubble bath, and... American Idol. What could be better?Am hushing the little devil sitting on my shoulder... love triangle bad!
Will enjoy this bottle all alone!

2003-04-23T11:51:00.000-04:00

Love Triangle
Why is it that I am one of those girls that can never be happy with what she has?
I am usually forced into some make-believe love triangle that leaves me angst ridden and usually alone in the end.

Example:

High School Prom
Coke addict boyfriend leaves for rehab, Daisy left with no date. (I was going through my bad boy phase, ok).
Dark and maybe a bit too mysterious ex-boyfriend (Coke addict's best friend) enters picture (with current crazy girlfriend in tow) and asks Daisy to prom. Daisy declines when crazy g.f. threatens to tear her petal for petal.
Finally, Jr. High crush fesses up to long time admiration of pretty flower and asks her to prom. Yeah! She has a date. This lasts about one week before little flower decides that he is just too cute to keep to herself and passes him off to her best friend.

Freshman Year
Again with the best friends thing...
Was asked to play in a band and had crush on both guitarist and his best friend/lead singer.
Well, the boys were afraid that since they both liked the little flower that it would end up being trouble for their friendship and the band if either of them dated the little flower. So they made a pact not to ask out the little flower, instead they continued to woo and court her behind each other's back. Unfortunately, the little flower's good friend got involved with lead singer and huge confrontation ensued after little flower and singer finally did hook up. Guitarist and good friend, feeling extremely betrayed (bad little flower), forgave lead singer and continued crusade against little flower.

Senior Year, College Party
Little Flower throws party in her pretty little garden. Lots of other pretty little flowers come, as well as a few weeds (unfortunately, not the good kind). Little flower finds herself in middle of drunken debate with current boyfriend, ex-boyfriend, and sexual tension boy who she would really like to be dating and who would really have liked to be dating her. All three of whom end up storming out of little flower's garden.

Fast Forward - Post College Scene
Every crush the little flower seems to have turns into love triangle due to the huge stamp across her forehead reading "Married/Engaged/Otherwise Inaccessible Men Please Add A Bit Of Drama To My Life!"

Am trying very, very hard to avoid current love triangle debaucle by reinforcing my position that none of it is real anyway. This is just another scene from a really bad soap opera. This is not my life!

2003-04-21T03:47:00.000-04:00

Click, Clack, click, clack, high heels on the pavement.
Plaster Jesus man echos in the silence -
Moonlight cuts right through.

Haiku for Shane
Smiling Irish Eyes
Sweet Potato Cowgirl Waits
To Hear From You Soon

April smoke cloud leaves
Haze of swirling Irish dreams
blowing on the wind

Another star falls
from the heavens and the sky is just a
little bit darker... So I bought a glow-in-the-dark
Jesus head for my chest of drawers and now
I get all the protection I need... but still
I can't shake these thoughts that wake me in
the middle of the night all alone... I guess I
never should have let you go.
I know you tried to tell me so... but every
time you whisper expectations in my ear,
it's like you disappear... And all that's on my mind
is dinner... by myself... in a small cafe...
on another planet light years... away

2003-04-20T13:43:00.000-04:00

Welcome to New York
Yes, it's cold at times.
Yes, it's rather expensive.
Yes, you are expected to tip your waitress at least %15 (even for mediocre service).
Yes, it's sometimes pretentious.
Yes, a martini costs $12.
Yes, traffic sucks and the drivers are crazy.
Yes, you might have to wait in line at a velvet rope to get into a good club.
Yes, you might not even get in.
Yes, many New Yorkers are rude and the others don't have time to say excuse me when you are standing in their way on the sidewalk taking a picture of some tall building.
No, I don't want to go out before 11:00 p.m.
No, I don't want the waiter to take our picture.
No, I don't want to go souvenir shopping in Little Italy this afternoon.
No Toto, you ARE NOT in fucking Kansas anymore. Get over it.
You are in New York City. I happen to like it here. If you don't, then go home.
I don't want to hear about it.

If you're here to visit New York City then you're in the right place... If you're here to visit me, well, it sure as hell doesn't feel like it.

I hope you enjoy Little Italy.

2003-04-16T16:27:00.000-04:00

Well, the weekend is finally over... yes, I realize it is Wednesday! This is what happens when you have friends in town from far away. You end up drinking your weekend into oblivion and paying for it for the rest of the week. I did have a great time though and made all kinds of new friends... at Korova Milk bar on Friday night, on the Westside highway on Saturday night (don't ask, not a sober moment), and singing karaoke at Fitzpatrick's on Sunday night...
"This is the story of six strangers who were picked to live in a bar in NYC, have their lives taped and see what happens when people stop being polite and start singing karaoke..." The picture is worth a thousand words, cause this is my United States of WHATEVER!

I think Greenwich boy is giving me an easy out - hasn't called in over a week. Now if I could just take it instead of letting my ego get in the way. However, Westside Highway boy has called several times. Damn you tequila!!!!

I spent my lunch break on the lawn lying in the grass and soaking up the rays. It felt so nice to have warmth and sunshine again - even if only for a day...

Ok, I am trying to make the ultimate summer mix - upbeat classic sing-along songs that I can jam out to all summer long. I need your suggestions (YES, that means you)!!!! Here's what we've got so far:
Livin' on a Prayer - thanks to my new found Bon Jovi obsession
Big Yellow Taxi - Joni Mitchell
Midnight Train to Georgia - Gladys Knight and the Pips
Toadies - Possum Kingdom
Free Fallin - Tom Petty
Play that Funky Music - Wild Cherry
Walking on Sunshine - Katrina and the Waves
Paradise City - GnR
Born in the USA - Springsteen
Cryin' - Aerosmith
Ooops I did it again - Britney (sorry, but it has to be done)
A little less conversation - Elvis
Lucy in the sky with diamonds - Beatles
Ring of Fire - Johnny Cash
Devil went down to Georgia - Charlie Daniels

2003-04-10T13:11:00.000-04:00

"War, war, war! This war talk's spoiling all the fun at every party this spring. I get so bored I could scream!"
~Scarlett O'Hara

Ladies and Gentlemen it's that time again...
Bingo/Karaoke night with the girls! Hopefully there will be enough fruity drinks on hand to make up for lack of sunshine. Might even be the cure for my wintertime/wartime blues. And if you've never been out with Scary Spice, let me tell you - she has great mix cd's, but you just might find yourself singing "If you want to be my lover" to a group of wheelchair bound bar patrons in the Ghetto. Seriously. Hmmmm, where will the night take us???
B-I-N-G-O!!!!!!

Greenwich Boy Update:
We went out again on Saturday, but we haven't spoken this week. I think it's best this way - casual and no commitment! I can't believe I'm dating like a man! I like it!

2003-04-08T15:12:00.000-04:00

Ok, forget what I said yesterday. I've come to realize that I really am SAD - Seasonal Affects Disorder! It's the snowstorm in april, the cloudy skies, brown grass, and the cold wind that has me feeling (or not feeling as the case may be) so apathetic. I need sun and sand and fruity alcoholic beverages to make me feel better! ENOUGH of this torpid season! Give me sunshine or give me death!

2003-04-07T09:12:00.000-04:00

Why I Write
"Of course I stole the title for this talk from George Orwell. One reason I stole it was that I like the sound of the words: Why I write. There you have three short unambiguous words that share a sound, and the sound they share is this:
I
I
I
In many ways writing is the act of saying I, of imposing oneself upon other people, of saying listen to me, see it my way, change your mind. It's an aggressive, even a hostile act. You can disguise its aggressiveness all you want with veils of subordinate clauses and qualifiers and tentative subjunctives, with ellipses and evasion - with the whole manner of intimating rather than claiming, of alluding rather than stating - but there's no getting around the fact that setting words on paper is the tactic of a secret bully, an invasion, an imposition of the writer's sensibility on the reader's most private space." ~Joan Didion

I watch
as the snow absorbs
the spring

Looking for a reason to be...
Have been in weird mood lately - not manic, not depressive, just nothing at all. Is this possible - to have lost all feeling? I try to cry and there are no tears; I try to laugh and I have no voice... am neither happy nor sad, elated nor enraged - just ambiguous and frustrated and left wondering if I'll ever feel anything again.